Today, my sister had an emotional breakdown because two guys love her and she can't pick just one. Meanwhile I'm single and spend my time laying treats on my floor in a pattern and watching my rabbit run in circles. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I listened to my best friend complain, again, about the two guys she's seeing, and how she doesn't know which one to choose, because they're both perfect. Meanwhile, I'm cleaning up my dog's loose stools, haven't had a date in over three years, and I'm also sharing a room with the very same best friend. FML
Today, I bought my sister a bunny and all it does is try to bang my cat, and shit and piss in my room to mark its territory. FML
Today, my girlfriend left me for my sister. I can't stop thinking about all those days they went out alone for "girl time." FML
Today, my sister was dumped by her boyfriend. As my mother was comforting her, I overheard her say "Honey, it's okay, you're the pretty one. Think of those worse off than you. Think of your sister, she might never get a boyfriend." FML
Today, my younger sister's dog broke its leg. The vets are closed today so instead of going on a date with a girl I have been trying to get for at least 2 years, I need to carry an 80 lb. dog that hates me, up and down the stairs. I already got bit twice. FML
Today, my sister got married. For the second time. She's 30. Two men have loved her enough to cry over their vows to her. Every single person there asked me why I wasn't married yet. FML
Today, my girlfriend ran off with my sister. FML
Today, I'm stuck in a nightmare where one of my young twins is fixated on spending as much time with her sibling as possible, while the other one is a complete introvert who wants her sister to leave her alone as much as possible. Either way, someone is upset and crying, mostly me. FML
Today, after watching my roommate and her boyfriend be all lovey dovey for months, I now have to watch two of our other friends flirting as well. I'm painfully single and have been struggling to change that for years. FML
Today, I found out that the person I love, who is also a friend, is now in a relationship with my sister. FML
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Top comments
Rhian00 17
Relationships are overrated anyway. Your pastime sounds much more fun!
Soninuva 41
Don't worry, OP, you'll find the right one for you soon enough!
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Comments (95)
WhiteCrimson 23
Holy crap. You must have an awesome rabbit. Why don't you get out there and meet some people. You need a social life to get a lover
Epikouros 32
Yep, she could join the Rabbit Running League.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Is your sister called Bella?
aria78 19
I've always found if you are torn between two guys then they are both not the one. Atleast you have your rabbit. She will probably be single again soon.
DorklyComicFan 8
Since comments are closed on the anecdote above, I'll leave my witty comment here on this one. "Sounds like he wasn't having a gay ol' time."
Nolimit2217 32
This made my day.
asparagus12 21
You life is average! Not FML!
Kiel182_fml 6
Does she have to choose between a vampire and a werewolf ?
azwethinkweiz87 11
Sounds like me and my sister! Feel for you, sucks sometimes having a pretty sister :(
worldclassrager 41
I should try that...that might be mildly entertaining...like a cat with a laser pointer... Anyway everyone has someone out there maybe they will enjoy watching your rabbit do a lap or two you never know...
daisiebud 18
Rabbit? Get a dog, they're better than any boyfriend or girlfriend.
warriorkalia 3
You, sir, have never owned a rabbit. They're like the best part of a dog and a cat combined. They don't bother you and make a lot of noise and aren't super needy, are fun to watch while they hop around and eat things and interact with their environment. They clean themselves and don't usually get hairballs nearly as often as a cat. They have clearly visible moods and will let you know if they want something through physical contact. They are loving and sweet, and can be litterbox trained. As long as they don't chew through every wire in your house, they're practically ideal pets.
skyeyez9 25
I had a rabbit, they are fun to have. The only bad part is (at least with mine) you need to rabbit proof the area they will be in. They have a tendency to like chewing on power cords. You have to keep them out of its reach.