Today, after spotting my ex-boyfriend's truck in a desolate parking lot, I decided to "decorate" the muddy side of it with a rather large male appendage. After checking around me to make sure there were no witnesses, I got to work. I probably should have made sure he wasn't sitting in the truck. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was parking my car outside of my apartment, but the big truck next to the spot went over the line. I squeezed in anyway. Later, I discovered the truck had left and someone keyed my car. They left a note saying, "Good parking job, asshole." FML
Today, as I stopped at a traffic light, I noticed the man in the car next to me break out in laughter. I pulled over later on to see that someone had drawn a large penis on the side of my van. I then spent all my morning cleaning it off. I went outside later only to see someone had redrawn it. FML
Today, when leaving my apartment, I instantly noticed there was a giant dump truck in our lot, which turned out to be directly behind my car. After making a 20-point escape from my parking space and getting to work late, my roommate texts me, "DUDE guess what I got last night." A giant dump truck. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend dumped sand into the crankcase of my truck and then filled it to the top with water after I dumped him for being immature and not respecting my things. FML
Today, I went out with my ex-boyfriend on a date. The night consisted of me sitting in the back seat of his friend's truck while they drove around to pick up things for the party they were going to have that same night. After they picked everything up, he asked where I wanted to get dropped off. FML
Today, while I was waiting to pull out of a parking space, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to put the car into reverse instead of drive while I was waiting for traffic to clear. I don't think the people who own the car behind me were laughing. Nor is my now ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, while working at my truck stop, I helped a trucker check his tires. He seemed like a pretty nice guy, and we chatted for a bit. After he took off and I walked back inside, I went to clean the shower he was in before. Turns out he took a shit on the floor. His wife had been in there with him. FML
Today, in my tidy, small-town neighborhood, I parked my car 50 metres further back from my usual spot just across from our house on a half-empty public street, because it was taken. Apparently, someone didn't appreciate this. So much so, they put a used condom under my windshield wiper. FML
Today, I was in a parking lot looking for a spot, and after driving around for a long while I finally found one. A homeless man was taking a shit on it. FML
Today, out of pure desperation and loneliness, I went out with my ex-boyfriend. It ended with him hitting me and driving off with my car. He's in jail now. What was I thinking? FML
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Top comments
omgshaylaaa 0
ydi op!! that's pretty imature!
FYLDeep 26
That was a total dick move on your part.
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Comments (90)
omgshaylaaa 0
ydi op!! that's pretty imature!
omgshaylaaa 0
immature. sorry. iPod.
MyChemical_fml 0
Couldn't just played it off like you were trying to take the mud off and make it clean so he'd come back to you and you could make passionate love everyday forever. Embrace the run on sentences.
Ouchy265 0
LMFAO
Ninjasaurus18 9
Yes, that's the most immature thing I've ever read.
WhackTheJackal 22
Very imature indeed. It's definitely not immature.
poprox4life 3
Hahah that would've helped just a little
lzenon 0
agreed.
kkbabe01xo 0
smooooooth.
sloaan 0
Yeah, probably.
darriel123 0
haha yup you deserved that . not only was it immature but also messed up ! totally STUPID (:
metal8214 0
well I would have done it, random penis drawings ftw!
Illyssa_fml 4
Hahahahaha!!! Epic Fail!!! That's funny though.
zp5 4
Good job.
FYLDeep 26
That was a total dick move on your part.
DynamicDave 11
Haha, that's a win right there!
kristenp 0
literally
lilycanscool 6
No pun intended
bilyfiskin 0
DUMBASS!!
monkeyCanDoMYJob 7
you checked and yet you fail to see if anyone was in the truck itself? And it is not "probably should have" is more "I should have check to see if anyone was in the truck"
Luky13 0
actually she had it right:|
spanelli 16
No shit. 14 was saying that she should change her sentence to "should have", because she really should have checked if her boyfriend were in the truck or not.
spanelli 16
Sorry, ex-boyfriend.