Today, I've been single for so long, I very nearly had a wet dream about an anthropomorphic frog. A FROG. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML
Today, I have been single and out of the game for so long that instead of having real wet dreams, I now dream about jacking off. FML
Today, I woke up exhausted because a croaking frog had kept me awake the night before. This has happened every night for the past week, and no matter how far away I take the frog, it always ends up sitting in the same place the next morning. FML
Today, it’s been so long since I’ve had sex, even my wet dreams are about doing it solo. FML
Today, I woke up after having a wet dream about Marge Simpson. I really need to get laid. FML
Today, after a 7-year dry spell, I finally got laid. The downside? It was in my dreams and involved a character from My Little Pony forcing itself on me. Now I hate that fucking stupid show more than ever. FML
Today, I was backpacking, and I was in a tent. It had rained all day and finally, I was dry. I settled down in my slightly damp sleeping bag. I woke up halfway through the night with a frog on my face and my feet in freezing cold water. Our tent had drifted into a frog pond. FML
Today, as a frog biologist I was out in the field searching for a relatively rare frog species. After three hours I finally heard the frog call and I crept closer and closer to the sound until... squish... I stepped on the very frog I was trying to collect. They're endangered. FML
Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML
Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML
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Top comments
EBrogen 12
Stop watching Japanese programs.
mekiswrite 21
Leave Kermit alone
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Comments (8)
RichardPencil 32
Hey, if you're into frogs, you're just lazy. I understand that it can be difficult get another human to have sex with you, but there are plenty of frogs that are DTF out there. You might have a problem getting one to commit so you're not longer single, but is that so bad if you have a lot of frog **** buddies?
Andrea Klima 4
I agree
cacheson 42
How do you “nearly” have a wet dream…?
RichardPencil 32
You wake up with an unresolved boner.
EBrogen 12
Stop watching Japanese programs.
Jonkbaby 23
Hello my darling hello my honey hello my ragtime gaaaal
RichardPencil 32
Hahaha! You must be really old like me!
mekiswrite 21
Leave Kermit alone
bleachedraven 14
No one's gonna ask about a frog in their throat?
BurnInDemonFire 39
No! Bad! You leave Asui alone! She's still underage, dammit!
xaonng 5
times are hard but don't let it get you hot and bothered