Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML
Today, I was undressing for my girlfriend. I thought I was being all smooth and sexy, until I went to sit on the side of the bed and beckon her over. Instead, I sat heavily on my balls, screamed, then fell off the bed sobbing like a girl. FML
Today, a fresh gust of wind blew a really attractive woman's skirt up in front of me, revealing her yellow panties with Pikachu's face on it. Pulling her skirt down and giving me an evil leer, instead of apologizing, I somehow blurted out, "Pikachu!" imitating its voice. I ultimately got slapped on the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, I started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection, all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting frisky. She got my cock out, stopped, and told me it looked like "Rufus the naked mole rat." She spent the next 20 minutes showing me pictures, describing in detail why they looked similar, and laughing. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I'm "so hot". I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds, "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply, "I didn't know you were into Pokémon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokémon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML
Today, as my wife and I were getting intimate, I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whispered in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Welshite 40
It was super effective, wasn't it?
meekthekit 6
If my boyfriend had pokemon boxers I would marry him right then and there.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (242)
lucianaamelia 21
How is this bad. It's awesome! You guys are a cool couple
onorexveritas 24
that's hilarious xD
soylentgreens 8
OMG that FML made me literally ROFL for a few minutes
FILMdude 4
You should have released your metapod and activate harden. She would've been impressed.
jem970 19
How old are you? I would laugh to, but it could have been worse. Also, that "Dickachu I choose you!" bit is awesome.
alera_fml 12
That is awesome! How is that an fml?
Gummybearjunkie 3
omg that is HILARIOUS.
theknozzle 14
She sounds like a keeper, to be honest.
CJ91516 11
She has no respect for Pokemon. Leave her. POKEMON FOREVER!!!!
persings 5
I agree Pokemon are forever awesome
ShoyuSauceSoup 26
Funniest. FML. Ever.