Anonymous
Viby, Denmark
Plumbing issues
Today, I'm constipated AND having diarrhea at the same time. It feels like I'm going to explode. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
Two speeds
Today, I've realized that I have two modes: Constipated, or ultra explosive diarrhea. FML
Anonymous
Germany
Two states of matter
Today, I learned that is it possible to be constipated and have diarrhea at the same time. You run to the toilet every half-hour, but almost nothing comes out and you feel so bloated you could burst, while eating almost nothing. FML
Anonymous
Saint-laurent, Canada
Today, I've been chronically constipated so long that I was actually grateful for the sudden blast of diarrhea that ruined my pants. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, it's my wedding day, and I have uncontrollable diarrhea. FML
Sostupid
Canada
Today, I had a panic attack because I was constipated. FML
lunarclips
Brandon, Canada
Today, is the day I graduate. Today is the day I have explosive diarrhea and I haven't moved far from the toilet since I woke up this morning. FML
Anonymous
United States
Uranus
Today, my body couldn't seem to decide whether I had constipation or diarrhea, so it decided to split the difference by making me push my turd out painfully for ten minutes, then let me go. FML
Anonymous
Perrysburg, United States
Sophie's choice
Today, I got random constipation followed by diarrhea. It's 1:30am and my sleeping medication is making me fall asleep, but every time I try to get off the toilet I get another diarrhea spasm. Either I fall asleep on the toilet or shit myself in my sleep. FML
AW
Today, my husband and I are both suffering from food poisoning. He has horrible, raging, rank smelling, explosive diarrhea; I am vomiting every 15 minutes. We have one bathroom. FML
Will
France
Today, I had food poisoning. I spent all day on the can. I also had a bucket to throw up into at the same time. I was sick out of both ends, at the same time. FML
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Thanks for the clarification and imagery. Doesn't look like I'll be finishing off my chocolate mousse anytime soon, does it? Thanks!
RichardPencil 32
How can this be? Is this an example of shit logic? Is this some sort of parallel universe, quantum mechanics thing? Schroedinger's Litter Box?
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Comments (0)
RichardPencil 32
How can this be? Is this an example of shit logic? Is this some sort of parallel universe, quantum mechanics thing? Schroedinger's Litter Box?
Nikki 17
You can have overflow from your constipation, so whatever can make it past the blockage is generally going to be liquid
RichardPencil 32
Thanks for the clarification and imagery. Doesn't look like I'll be finishing off my chocolate mousse anytime soon, does it? Thanks!
Nikki 17
Think of it more as chocolate milk, mousse would be way too thick!