Today, I learned that is it possible to be constipated and have diarrhea at the same time. You run to the toilet every half-hour, but almost nothing comes out and you feel so bloated you could burst, while eating almost nothing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I'm constipated AND having diarrhea at the same time. It feels like I'm going to explode. FML
Today, I've realized that I have two modes: Constipated, or ultra explosive diarrhea. FML
Today, I've been chronically constipated so long that I was actually grateful for the sudden blast of diarrhea that ruined my pants. FML
Today, I got random constipation followed by diarrhea. It's 1:30am and my sleeping medication is making me fall asleep, but every time I try to get off the toilet I get another diarrhea spasm. Either I fall asleep on the toilet or shit myself in my sleep. FML
Today, my body couldn't seem to decide whether I had constipation or diarrhea, so it decided to split the difference by making me push my turd out painfully for ten minutes, then let me go. FML
Today, it's day three of me having unexplained diarrhea that leaves me with such bad gas that it keeps me up at night. Less than a month ago I was complaining to my doctor about having severe chronic constipation. My digestive tract can't seem to make up it's mind. FML
Today, after a five day bout of severe chronic constipation, I decided to get some orange juice and increase my water intake. The good news is that I'm no longer constipated. The bad news is that I've got diarrhea now. FML
Today, I'm a week into a prescription of extremely constipating antibiotics. I also just caught the stomach bug going around at work that causes aggressive diarrhea. The two combined mean I have a constant, slow-moving stream of thick, foul-smelling sludge coming out of me. FML
Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML
Today, I had bad diarrhea. I went to the toilet seven times while my cousins came to spend time with me. I spent more time in the toilet than I did with them. Once they'd left, I went to the toilet for what would be the eighth time in a couple of hours. I now can no longer feel my ass. FML
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Top comments
Jo David 2
Hi My mum suffered like this due to having rectal cancer. Please go and get checked and insist upon a colonoscopy! Good luck, hope you aren’t dying
Charlie Given 28
If you don't get constipation often then you need to increase your daily fiber intake. But if this is a common occurrence or has been going on for more than two weeks, then you need to go to a doctor and get checked out .This could be a sign of multiple different serious issues such as a rectal stricter ,IBS ,Crohn's disease, cancer etc.
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Comments (6)
RichardPencil 32
She's gonna blow!!!! Run!!!
kathgz 7
Is there something going around? Because I have had the same issue for about a week now! It's super frustrating!
coius 23
Ditto, my wife and I have been fighting for the chance to sit on the white throne. Along with fevers, chills, sweating, cramps, nausea/vomiting, muscle pain and in general feeling like we got a visit from the demons of hell, I think there is a GI virus going around. Before we had it, my dad had it, visited several days over the last week including not using a mask (and my immune system is fscked from being so sick it almost killed me in highschool), and neglected to mention he was having all this. My wife and I feel SO LUCKY we have family values of sharing things...*end sarcasm.*
Jo David 2
Hi My mum suffered like this due to having rectal cancer. Please go and get checked and insist upon a colonoscopy! Good luck, hope you aren’t dying
Gradask 10
When you are constipated your body starts loosing up the stool so it can push the blockage away, that why you have a flume ride in your butt. Your body is trying to wiggle your shit loose.
Mathalamus 25
That explains a lot.
Charlie Given 28
If you don't get constipation often then you need to increase your daily fiber intake. But if this is a common occurrence or has been going on for more than two weeks, then you need to go to a doctor and get checked out .This could be a sign of multiple different serious issues such as a rectal stricter ,IBS ,Crohn's disease, cancer etc.
Jimmy Trout 3
This could be a bowel obstruction and very serious, please have it checked out.