Today, I discovered my boyfriend prays before and after sex, because he thinks he'll keep his abstinence by doing so. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML
Today, I discovered that my fiancé consistently thinks about his fear of breaking his penis while we have sex. He's afraid to have sex with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend forced me to do stretching exercises with him before and after sex as a "safety precaution". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time, the one day my period came early. He thought it was a sign from God and thinks we're going to hell. FML
Today, I learned that my boyfriend waits 'til I am asleep to wack off to porn on the internet. We haven't had sex in months because he doesn't want to. FML
Today, my boyfriend of over a year decided he wants us to wait to get married before having sex again, after we've had sex almost every night of being together. FML
Today, I desperately tried to explain to my boyfriend why he shouldn't talk about the Bible during sex. He honestly doesn't understand. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wanted to hunt Easter eggs before we have sex. I'm glad he has his priorities straight. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML
Today, after months of dating, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to take things to the next level. He told me that he couldn't have sex with me because of his religious beliefs. I would've been fine with this if it weren't for the fact that I know he and his family are all atheists. FML
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Top comments
karmynashley 7
u have a stupid bf
Doortje 30
Hail Mary, Full of Grace, The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of death. Amen. SEX Hail Mary, Full of Grace, The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now, and at the hour of death. Amen. Yeah, that just wouldn't do it for me..
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Comments (104)
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
YLS, op. I feel bad now:/
kawigurl 0
this fml doesn't even make any sense. ur both idiots and I'M praying that u two don't procreate!
skyeyez9 25
So basically he is praying that his virginity magically stays with him, despite being sexually active? Bwahahaha {snort} heheehahahhaheehee.
skyeyez9 25
Sounds like a very unfortunate kid who grew up with prudish parents, made to attend abstinence seminars, wear a purity ring, told sex was evil....etc
EllieB123 5
OP, your boyfriend is definitely an idiot.
HisShadow 1
What? Religion makes people stupid? who would have thought...
someone234 5
As a christian, I honestly think he is acting pointlessly cus either way he's still having sex outside marriage, and its not any use praying if he's gna willingly go do it again...
Iknoweverything 29
To the religious arguement: It is stupid to believe that science is the only thing that exists, and that there is no supreme being. Plenty of scientific "laws" have been proven wrong by reality. Science cannot exist without a god. No god can exist without science. Personally you should just quit bickering and realize that neither explanation has all the answers in itself. Even SCIENTISTS believe in SOME sort of supreme being out there, because there are certain situations where the rules were changed, for one thing. Take ice. Ice is the only solid that floats on it's liquid form. Every other solid will sink when submerged in it's liquid form. Someone had to change the rules. As for OP: He IS stupid. The whole point of praying for ABSOLUTION is basically: Hey God, I've sinned. I know I've sinned, but I don't want to keep sinning, and plan to stop. Please forgive me. So for someone to pray for forgiveness before AND after sex, he's obviously been misled, or he doesn't know a damn thing about being a Christian. You don't pray to be forgiven before you do the deed, I mean come ON! Obviously he feels what he is doing is wrong, otherwise he wouldn't pray. OP, you should break up with him, for several reasons. The first being that he is a hypocrite, and a religious hypocrite, which is a hundred times worse. The second being that he obviously isn't consistent with whatever promises he is making to God. If he can't be consistent when believing in a supreme being who can send him to hell, he probably won't keep his promises to YOU, a mere human who can only bust his balls. The third being that he is praying because he thinks he's doing something wrong. Go have sex with someone who feels right with you. You deserve at least that.
mola_mola 3
1) Scientific laws have been broken because scientific discovery is about increasing our knowledge. If something new is found to disprove a past theory then we have learnt something new and that's how we can move forwards. 2) I do not believe that there is a supreme being because if there is a supreme being a more supreme being would've had to have created the afore mentioned supreme being etc. 3) Ice floats on its liquid form because when it solidifies it becomes less dense and not because, "Someone had to change the rules". I don't really care about the rest of what you said that is all :)
HomeAl0ne 20
Does he believe in the Second Coming? If so, all good.
fearfulsymmetry 1
Op, is your boyfriend a Catholic?