Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time, the one day my period came early. He thought it was a sign from God and thinks we're going to hell. FML
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend confessed his desire to have sex while I'm on my period. He calls it "bloody victory." FML
Today, my boyfriend of 2 months and I had sex for the first time last night. This afternoon he texted me saying, "I had an amazing night with you yesterday." Following that text he said, "I forgot to tell you I have an STD." FML
Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up to come spend the night at his house, and on the way he started pulling over to get some condoms. I told him no need, I was on my period. He turned the car around and took me home. FML
Today, while fingering my girlfriend in the dark, I tried to be sexy and licked my fingers. After we turned the lights back on, we realized that her period had come early. FML
Today, my future mother-in-law freaked out my very religious fiancé by telling him fornication is gonna send him to hell, because when I was with them in January we had sex every day for a month and she's still mad about it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I made love for the first time. Before we left his house so he could walk me home, I fixed my hair by the hall mirror and joked about having serious sex hair. My boyfriend quickly reminded me that his incredibly religious mother was in the next room. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he likes having sex during my period because it makes him feel like he stabbed a small animal to death. FML
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Top comments
cmdd 5
A reaction like that would suggest he is not ready to have sex.
Levi2411 41
Ah and the satanic waterfall strikes again.
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Comments (63)
cmdd 5
A reaction like that would suggest he is not ready to have sex.
Grisha_fml 18
should have waited till you guys were married. Then you wouldn't have to worry about such misunderstandings.
TheHcwalker 20
He's just religious, what's wrong with that
Glamisbound 14
fiery goodness
Emma1562 35
It's okay just try to see if he wants to when you get off. ?
Levi2411 41
Ah and the satanic waterfall strikes again.
gracehi 33
And during Holy Week too. Tsk tsk.
Comrox 19
It sounds like you need to talk about sex more. Make sure you're both comfortable and 110% ready. He could have not been ready. He might have been nervous. Make sure to talk about it! Good luck OP!
fivergirl 5
That was an OVARYaction...
wishy95 6
That was the perfect comment xD
Bansheefaerie 9
It really sounds like he is not ready for sex. I'm sorry OP, not a great day for you.
kaitalicious 3
Maybe he's right? It IS Holy Week...
SpyroMello 29
God doesn't play a role in when you start your period.
gracehi 33
Well, if you believe that God can make a virgin conceive, logic follows that He can begin and end a menstrual cycle whenever He pleases. However, if we're going with the Bible as a reference point, that doesn't seem like something He'd do to let a guy know he shouldn't fornicate with his girlfriend. Subtly isn't God's thing when it comes to letting people know He's displeased with their behavior. He's more into global floods, plagues, murder angels, and spontaneous death.
DoDaJulio 13
OOOLLLD TESTAMENT!! In the AD years, especially while Christ was alive, He would tell people, or give them signs or bad times to signify sin, or its reasons. Murder Angels and spontaneous death were reserved for people bad enough for God to destroy every living thing on earth, if it wasn't for Noah and his family bringing the animals and themselves on the ark. Trying not to let people have somewhat false information, although that is ironically and partially true ;)
gracehi 33
Actually, 33, when I mentioned spontaneous death, I was referring to a New Testament story. Evidently God takes lying about donations to the church very seriously.
Grisha_fml 18
17 who gets to decide when it comes early?
Laphog 17
Well, bloody hell that is unfortunate