Today, I cleaned up the dog poop from around the back yard. This is how I discovered that my dog's favorite snack appears to be used condoms. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML
Today, I discovered that one of my dogs has taken a liking to rolling over his own poop. I found out by petting him. FML
Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML
Today, I was eating chocolate chip cookies around the house and saw a chocolate chip on the floor. Not wanting my dog to eat it, given that chocolate is poisonous for dogs, I swiped it up with my finger and put it to my mouth. It was then that I realized it was a stub of my dog's poop. FML
Today, I found out my roommate had mistaken my toothbrush for his dog's. So for the last month he's been using my toothbrush on his dog. The dog's favorite meal? Fresh cat poop. FML
Today, I got home to find a pair of my dirty underwear (that were in the dirty clothes basket) in the middle of the living room. I must be delicious, because my dog was licking them. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML
Today, I had to dig through my dog's poop again because I thought I saw a worm, but it was just the remains of the paper towels my husband leaves all over the house. My efforts to make them both stop have obviously fallen on deaf ears. FML
Today, I discovered my dog pooped in my bed, under the covers, by rolling over onto it. FML
Today, I was helping my Dad pick up the pieces of bark that came off the tree that we'd just cut down. I bent over to grab a dark looking piece of bark. Turn out it was my dogs crap. Fresh, warm, moist piece of crap to be exact. FML
Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML
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Top comments
Queen_bee1234 21
He's getting all the bitches!
Soninuva 41
Hey, at least he used protection!
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Comments (54)
justingug76 14
Brings up an uncomfortable situation when you tell your dog to come.
captainsmegma 12
Where does doggie get these delicious delicacies?
aldoshoes 4
Not necessarily. Maybe someone's been rodding your dog up the pooper.
prized_loser 17
Why is that a bad thing? Perfect way for an affair!
aelabed 17
Probably high in protein
samlovesham1234 9
I'm wondering if they were flavoured condoms. Also, better have a vet give the dog a thorough exam to make sure it's still healthy.
the_real_dvd 21
Maybe they're flavored, or maybe the dog just likes the cream filling.
shortcake18 15
Sounds like he needs extra lube
thatsme293 28
The sperm adds a salty taste you see.
rabid_otaku 29
Why are they lying around
fluffycatsdad 33
What do you do with your used condoms that your dog can not only find them, but eat them as well?