Today, I went to visit a friend I hadn't seen in ages who lives alone out in the country. I arrived and found the front door unlocked but no one was home. I went in anyway and helped myself to some food. Then a family I had never seen before came in, and I realized it wasn't my friend's house. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to what I thought was my friend’s house for a barbecue. I walked into the backyard and started chatting with people I didn't recognize. After about 20 minutes, I realized I was at the wrong house, eating a stranger's food. FML
Today, I confidently walked into what I thought was my friend's apartment for a party, only to find a confused elderly couple staring at me. Turns out, I was not only three doors down from where I thought his front door was, I was also on the wrong floor. FML
Today, I walked into what I thought was my friend's apartment, dropped my backpack on the couch, and started complaining about work. A complete stranger then walked out of the kitchen holding a sandwich, saw me, then yelled "HELP!" I apologized, grabbed my bag, and somehow took his TV remote with me. FML
Today, it was my second day of house-sitting. I was so out of my mind from not seeing people that I invited a bunch of friends over for dinner. I said I would pay for pizza and we could all hang out in the house. Even with an unsupervised house and free food, no one showed. FML
Today, I thought I was home alone. Likewise, my visiting grandfather thought he was alone. You can imagine the mutual surprise when I caught him stealing money from my sister's bedroom. FML
Today, I came home to a homeless man sleeping in my living room. It turns out he thought my house was abandoned due to its disheveled appearance, and decided to break in. FML
Today, I snuck into my aunt's house while she was working to raid her pantry, like I do most days. Excited for a snack cake, I went to the pantry. Apparently she'd found out, because there was a lock on it. FML
Today, after a week out of town, I came home to discover my front door unlocked. I was greeted by a reeking old lady and her gorging obese middle-aged daughter with a "Who the fuck are you?" and "What are you doing in my son's house?" Said son is the former owner, from whom I legally bought this house four years ago. FML
Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML
Today, as I returned home, I noticed some movement inside my house. Thinking it was a break-in, I called 911. It was my friends and some coworkers trying to throw me a surprise birthday party. Nobody's said a word to me since. FML
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Top comments
chemchic 7
Are you Goldilocks?
ImmaB3AST 7
Well, that's why you don't go into a house you aren't sure about. Then eat their food right away? That's just disrespectful. You deserve it.
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Comments (142)
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Walking in the front door without being let in, even if it's unlocked, is incredibly rude!
llamafish 25
OP should go in through the chimney next time. Much more socially acceptable.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Only if you're Santa.
lexiieeex3 32
That is extremely rude. You don't just help yourself. YDI big time.
Enslaved 38
Even if it was your friend's house, she'd be like "What the **** are you doing eating my food, bitch!"
perdix 31
You should offer to stick your finger down your throat and give back the food. I'm sure they'd prefer that you keep it.
reject214 10
I predicted the ending to this FML long before I got to the end. What kind if dumbass would do such a thing in a place they've never been before - oh you would. LOL!
holeyman 8
Same thing happened to me once. I was chased with a bat though
AznSamoan52 10
Geez Op, that was very rude of you to just walk into a house you thought was your friend's place. You were even more rude that you even helped yourself to someone else's food. The worst part is that it's someone else's home. Where the hell was your common sense and manners at the time? YDI.
itooamscrewed 10
I had someone come into my house thinking her friend lived there. Turns out her friend had moved a few months earlier and didn't tell her. It does happen. Hopefully the family will understand it was an honest mistake!
CherryLipBalm 1
What did the family say?
perdix 31
"Oh, don't hurt me! Here's my wife -- go ahead and rape her, but leave me alone! What? You're not an armed murderer-rapist? Oh, never mind. . . So, honey, what are you making for dinner?" Probably something like that.
CoolRainbowdash 15
Bitch, get out of our house.
mario2012 18
At least you got a snack out of it.