Today, I went to visit a friend I hadn't seen in ages who lives alone out in the country. I arrived and found the front door unlocked but no one was home. I went in anyway and helped myself to some food. Then a family I had never seen before came in, and I realized it wasn't my friend's house. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to what I thought was my friend’s house for a barbecue. I walked into the backyard and started chatting with people I didn't recognize. After about 20 minutes, I realized I was at the wrong house, eating a stranger's food. FML
Today, I confidently walked into what I thought was my friend's apartment for a party, only to find a confused elderly couple staring at me. Turns out, I was not only three doors down from where I thought his front door was, I was also on the wrong floor. FML
Today, I walked into what I thought was my friend's apartment, dropped my backpack on the couch, and started complaining about work. A complete stranger then walked out of the kitchen holding a sandwich, saw me, then yelled "HELP!" I apologized, grabbed my bag, and somehow took his TV remote with me. FML
Today, it was my second day of house-sitting. I was so out of my mind from not seeing people that I invited a bunch of friends over for dinner. I said I would pay for pizza and we could all hang out in the house. Even with an unsupervised house and free food, no one showed. FML
Today, I thought I was home alone. Likewise, my visiting grandfather thought he was alone. You can imagine the mutual surprise when I caught him stealing money from my sister's bedroom. FML
Today, I came home to a homeless man sleeping in my living room. It turns out he thought my house was abandoned due to its disheveled appearance, and decided to break in. FML
Today, I snuck into my aunt's house while she was working to raid her pantry, like I do most days. Excited for a snack cake, I went to the pantry. Apparently she'd found out, because there was a lock on it. FML
Today, after a week out of town, I came home to discover my front door unlocked. I was greeted by a reeking old lady and her gorging obese middle-aged daughter with a "Who the fuck are you?" and "What are you doing in my son's house?" Said son is the former owner, from whom I legally bought this house four years ago. FML
Today, I went with my family to go see a notoriously creepy abandoned house. We noticed the people had left a lot of stuff behind so we loaded up the car with books, records, etc. As we were leaving, we saw the family who lived there drive up. I robbed a house with my grandma. FML
Today, as I returned home, I noticed some movement inside my house. Thinking it was a break-in, I called 911. It was my friends and some coworkers trying to throw me a surprise birthday party. Nobody's said a word to me since. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
chemchic 7
Are you Goldilocks?
ImmaB3AST 7
Well, that's why you don't go into a house you aren't sure about. Then eat their food right away? That's just disrespectful. You deserve it.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (142)
graffitied_love 20
Am I the only one who thought "Goldilocks and the Three Bears"?
graffitied_love 20
Sorry I didn't see #5's comment
perdix 31
Maybe. This story made me think of "Hot MILF Gets ****** by Pool Boy." I may have an addiction to Internet ****.
ImmaB3AST 7
Perdix, I actually saw that a couple dad ago. LOL
perdix 31
#52, haha, instant classic? Did you see the original or a remake? The July 6, 2012 version was hot, but take a pass on the July 8, 2012 version (poor script) and July 14, 2012 sequel (bad cinematography.) The July 22, 2012 version is a lock for the MILFie (Yes, there is an academy that honor achievement in the MILF/pool boy genre.)
hailezz349 5
Hahaha sucks ta suck!
Fuck_Bullshit 3
You felt shitty huh? You probably shitted on yourself...
urbanimpression 6
Awesome! Haha
GoldenGrizzly 7
Um? I think you must have scared the crap out of that family. It is best to be certain you have the right house before you go in.
Rodders_SOTC 1
Free Food? That's a win!
supportcommand 17
How did you not know that it's not your friends house?? Had you never been there before?? FYL for being stupid.
Austyn57 1
can u say breaking and entering
Abbeygale 8
Who goes in to someone elses house and helps themselves to their food? Regardless of whether they're your friend, that's incredibly rude, I'd be pissed if my friends did it.
jamiebonvie 3
if youre friends with someone walking unto their house is not a big deal hahahaha thats why youre friends with them.
lidsthesquid 4
Except OP wasn't in the friends house, hence the FML.