Today, I orgasmed in front of someone for the first time. Too bad it was my dad who didn't knock before coming in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML
Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML
Today, after 3 months of no orgasms, I was in the shower, working to rectify that. As I was seconds away from coming, my dad loudly knocked on the door and demanded to know how much longer I was going to take. Probably another 3 months now, dad. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML
Today, while having hot sex with my boyfriend, I was experiencing my very first orgasm. Right when my mother walked in. We had no blankets. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, I decided to be adventurous and give my boyfriend head in the downstairs TV room. Just as he was about to come, I heard someone walking towards the door. I took my mouth off to get up and lock the door right as he came. I didn't make it to the door but my dad saw something he will never forget. FML
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Top comments
KK3137 31
So I guess you both came in the wrong place at the wrong time..
KuronoEru 26
I'm sorry that you have to avoid your dad for the rest of your life now..
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Comments (99)
Sazzles 17
Time to get a lock for that door.
veryunhappygirl 7
Why would you ********** while people are home? If I have to then I at least wait till like 1 am so I know they aren't going to walk in
wtffml1979 22
Do you really time out your masturbation? Well tonight at 1:25 I'm going to **********. Smh Sometime your horny and you have to relieve the pressure. Not saying waking down a busy sidewalk. But if your at HOME in YOUR bedroom and you feel like pleasuring yourself then that's perfectly ok in your room. Obviously you need to take appropriate pre action. ie. Lock door, bathroom, I dunno closet? Where ever, but timing masturbation leads to timing sex when married and that doesn't sound good. Later life could be ruined already and not know it. To sum it up, ********** when and whenever you want, legally of course.? ✊
wtffml1979 22
Hence the name- veryunhappygirl. ********** more often in a whim. Then your new. Some will be- veryhappygirl
cjfred 13
OP, care to follow up with your dad's reaction? I'm sure plenty of inquiring minds want to know. As a dad myself, I have no idea what I'd do with that; make a joke, or shut the door and forever pretend that it didn't happen.
wtffml1979 22
Being a dad myself of this age kids. Well only one but two more to follow. I would shut the door and give them time to see what they say if anything. Follow their lead with it. Hopefully one day it can be a joke. I was busted myself when I was younger. It's been made funny a couple times. It's life. We all do it, some much much more than others lol but it's natural....and fun
TabooSushi 24
Locks. A chair under the handle. A heavy chest in front of the door. These are all your friend. Learn them, love them.
cappellaaa 23
OMG! That's prob the most awkward thing that could ever happen. Sorry op!
callmekakarot 10
that's kind of awkward.
Wolfipoo 31
I don't even know how to say this better, but OP, you might want to avoid eye contact for a while.
Camo23 21
Well now you know it cant get much more awkward
mattrd_fml 31
is op a guy or girl? I think this would be more mortifying for a girl, but still embarrassing either wah.
munchly 17
Your poor dad... I'm sure he'll never walk in like that again p