Today, I orgasmed in front of someone for the first time. Too bad it was my dad who didn't knock before coming in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML
Today, for the third time since breakfast, I accidentally walked in on my father wanking. FML
Today, after 3 months of no orgasms, I was in the shower, working to rectify that. As I was seconds away from coming, my dad loudly knocked on the door and demanded to know how much longer I was going to take. Probably another 3 months now, dad. FML
Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML
Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML
Today, while having hot sex with my boyfriend, I was experiencing my very first orgasm. Right when my mother walked in. We had no blankets. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, I decided to be adventurous and give my boyfriend head in the downstairs TV room. Just as he was about to come, I heard someone walking towards the door. I took my mouth off to get up and lock the door right as he came. I didn't make it to the door but my dad saw something he will never forget. FML
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Top comments
KK3137 31
So I guess you both came in the wrong place at the wrong time..
KuronoEru 26
I'm sorry that you have to avoid your dad for the rest of your life now..
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Comments (99)
eddy1965 6
Tell him you were doing laundry. It was a light load so you did it by hand.
Darkness_Hate 29
Fortunately you didn't squirt!
onlychildFTW 34
We don't know that.
False_Stupidity 42
If OP is male, then he definitely "squirted". There's no gender icon and the name is anonymous so who knows?
Ramos808 29
Is OP a boy or girl? It's extremely awkward either way, but I'm just wondering
siggy_mcsigx 22
Did he come to investigate because you were making lots of noise leading up to it? And I hope you were under a blanket. Either and anyway, fyl.
WCARlover 35
I don't know if I've ever been more embarrassed for someone in my whole life than I am right now
starile 20
Sympathy pain.
DaRito 25
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
YDI for not locking the door or being in the bathroom.
Aimeejasmine 15
They deserve being walked in on? What kind of victim blaming bullshit is that, lots of teenagers aren't allowed locks on their doors
toaster87 19
Atleast it wasn't your uncle would bang you senseless if you weren't related
SyN0pTiiC 13
Nice haha!
cari_cat 19
I think you'll both feel so awkward that you can just avoid each other for a few days and luckily not have to have a conversation about this. He'll just know to knock from now on
travellingfun 18
To be honest even if he did knock, it was probably already too late.
limegreenpoopie 31
Lol save up for a lock?