Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old daughter holding a lit lighter to the underside of a spoon, which was full of baking powder. She was trying to breathe in the fumes to get high, and later confessed that she thought it's how heroin is made and used. FML
Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML
Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML
Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML
Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML
Today, my teenage son tried to huff a can of spray paint. FML
Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML
Today, my son dropped a firecracker in my flour storage bin, probably thinking the pop would make flour go everywhere. I guess he’s never heard of a dust explosion because what he actually did was set fire to the flour, causing such a violent shockwave it blew the kitchen window out of the wall. FML
Today, my neighbors were busted for a meth lab in their garage. Yesterday, I signed the mortgage. Welcome to our new neighborhood, kids. FML
Today, I found my 15-year-old son sleeping on the couch. I asked why, and he said he'd rented his room out to someone on Craigslist to make extra money, so he was getting used to sleeping in the living room instead. FML
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Top comments
CoconutOil 7
Most 15 year olds work on their "math" not "meth" :P
jetsown08 21
Perhaps they need to refine their METHods, then.
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Comments (106)
boycrazy30007 12
I would beat his ass
Dogluvr1197 30
Wow... He didn't even try to google it?
restl3ss 6
It's funny because the actual recipe for meth is on the Internet. I just googled it
osm1989_fml 6
Everyone knows you need to throw some Nyquil somewhere into the mix. That's why you have to be ID'ed for it. Nyquil + baking soda = meth. Pretty sure that's how it works.
l23VIVE 17
Or maybe, he was trying to see if baking soda would work like an aphrodisiac?
gracehi 33
At least you know they're not "street" enough to know how to do it. That indicates that this is probably their first experiment with hard drugs.
FlyingPie 17
#71: If I had kids, I wouldn't feel comfortable knowing they were interested in drugs at all..
gracehi 33
True, but it's at the stage where an intervention would be pretty easy. You know...BEFORE they actually get addicted to meth.
IdleGear 0
I would not let him watch any more breaking bad, or teach him how to make quality Meth and retire
TheyCallMeDamien 18
EPIC FAIL
corleon198425 22
Send his ass to military school
l23VIVE 17
Your picture seems to go with your comment
perdix 31
You should be angry he tried to set up a meth lab, but grateful and relieved that he is such a dumb ass he thought cooking baking soda could make crystal meth. Tell him he needs sugar instead and then learn the symptoms of caramel addiction.
dansythomas 6
It's funny case in my neighbor hood, that's normal.
glittercookies 12
You look a bit too old to not know how to spell those words, my dear. Is this also common in your neighborhood?
dansythomas 6
I'm 14..