Today, I walked in on my fifteen-year-old son and his friends attempting to set up a rudimentary meth lab in his bedroom. I'm not sure whether to be angrier that they simply tried this, or that they thought burning up baking soda would somehow produce methamphetamine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old daughter holding a lit lighter to the underside of a spoon, which was full of baking powder. She was trying to breathe in the fumes to get high, and later confessed that she thought it's how heroin is made and used. FML
Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML
Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML
Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML
Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML
Today, my teenage son tried to huff a can of spray paint. FML
Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML
Today, my son dropped a firecracker in my flour storage bin, probably thinking the pop would make flour go everywhere. I guess he’s never heard of a dust explosion because what he actually did was set fire to the flour, causing such a violent shockwave it blew the kitchen window out of the wall. FML
Today, my neighbors were busted for a meth lab in their garage. Yesterday, I signed the mortgage. Welcome to our new neighborhood, kids. FML
Today, I found my 15-year-old son sleeping on the couch. I asked why, and he said he'd rented his room out to someone on Craigslist to make extra money, so he was getting used to sleeping in the living room instead. FML
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Top comments
CoconutOil 7
Most 15 year olds work on their "math" not "meth" :P
jetsown08 21
Perhaps they need to refine their METHods, then.
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Comments (106)
l23VIVE 17
Maybe! And I am just guessing here, maybe he was making a paper maché volcano?
DancinL 14
You can't do that by burning baking soda either...
l23VIVE 17
OP never said his son was burning the baking soda
l23VIVE 17
Wait, yes he did. Stupid short amount of editing time
l23VIVE 17
I'd go with failed meth orgy
keylimecat87 3
Wait... That's not how you make meth?
Trisha_aus 15
No, catch Walt and Jesse Sunday's on AMC to really learn.
slipmaster 6
i am proud if these kids. they are simply learning chemistry :)
RedPillSucks 33
But they weren't smart enough to go on the internet (yeah, repository of all truths), to research how to do it?
Welshite 40
Uh yeah, I'd definitely be angrier that they actually tried this. Chemistry is nothing to play around with. Believe me, I've come into contact with chemicals that react violently with just air or water vapor in the air. Even seemingly innocent compounds have the potential for disaster under the correct circumstances.
l23VIVE 17
Like sodium! It catches fire when you put it in water!
Trisha_aus 15
Yo, Mr.White?
Ray_of_midnight 23
Kitchen-table meth manufacture is dangerous. People have been known to burn down their houses doing it, and the house itself gets turned into a hazardous-waste zone requiring serious effort and money to remediate.
l23VIVE 17
Me? Or Welshite?
tisvana20 6
LWhy was 42 thumbed down? Sodium does combust on contact with air or water unless it's in a compound or covered in oil. I knew a kid who stole some sodium from IPC and when his pants ignited, he threw it in the toilet and then our school had one less toilet. Chemistry isn't for playing. Also Meth is bad. It makes your heart "explode."
ant1ion 12
How do you deal with those types of chemicals?
tisvana20 6
Alkali metals or the compounds to make meth? Alkali metals (and earths) you store under oil typically. I guess you can also turn them into a compound and just do the reactions you'd need to get the end result, but that would leave a lot of unnecessary bi-products and cause a lot of extra work.
TheDrifter 24
Definitely an orgy. Maybe he thought he could burn baking soda like incense to absorb any foul odors?
Trisha_aus 15
Call the DEA! Call hank!
GDIZZLE93 11
Bwaaaaaaaaaagh!
Enslaved 38
I want to laugh at this FML but then look beyond it and picture the OP's son has probably already tried meth. So sad. Look for the signs beyond missing spoons.
l23VIVE 17
Hmm or maybe his demonic cat peed on the carpet and he wanted to absorb the odor and wetness?
PaulB123 11
Definitely be more mad at the fact they were trying to make meth...