Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was out walking my dog. I was throwing a stick in the lake so he could go get it (he loves swimming). A friend called me. After I was done calling, another friend came by, and we talked for a while. When my dog barked, I accidentally threw my iPhone into the water instead of his stick. FML
Today, my parents called me to ask if I could drop my dog off to them on Sunday. They're having a Superbowl party and want to show her off to their guests. My dog is invited, but I'm not. FML
Today, I lost my dog. I looked around my neighborhood for hours, and found him under my bed asleep when I got home. FML
Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML
Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML
Today, my sister went into early labor. Instead of telling me, my mom turned to my dog and said, "Guess what? You're going to be an uncle!" Our dog ranks higher than me in our family's metaphorical food chain. FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, I took the dog for a 45 minute walk/jog. She sniffed everything on the ground like she always does. She marked her territory twice, then we finally got home. As soon as I took her off the leash inside, she ran to the kitchen and took a dump right on the kitchen mat. FML
Today, I invited my boss for supper as we get on pretty well. Everything was going well, until my German Shepherd bit him. FML
Today, while at my job as a hostess, I was seating a couple and their adorable little girl. I tried to ask how old she was, but what came out was, "Aww, what breed is she?" FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
vladmire 4
The real important thing to ask: is the t.v. Okay?
Neesalun 20
Lol! Poor baby!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (67)
JoseIsAdork 31
lol, hope he is OK, but damn I would have laughed. my dog recently passed away at 12 years old but when I read this all I could think of was my chico doing this because he would have haha. again hope your dog is OK but it made me smile because it reminded me of my dog.
KaylaTackett 18
Hahahahahahahahaha
alekrentz 1
Well ****. I'd be excited too.
merryhappy1887 20
I want your dog lmao that's to funny
MagicMike1496 6
Is the dog ok?
snippit 18
This made my day!
krakhd 15
LMFAO what a stupid dog
alycion 39
I had two dogs named after characters on shows I would watch all of the time. Pembleton ignored his name, but Diefenbaker would run to the tv every time. It never got old. I would sometimes put on Due South to watch her reaction.
Darkmim 5
Thanks for the laugh :)
fabricatedego 5
married with children? that show? I'm sorry hope the TV and your dog are ok.