Today, at lifeguard class, I played a victim while my peers strapped me to the backboard in the water. When I was strapped down, I got wood in a wet swimsuit. My hands were strapped down so I could do nothing to hide it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, in my lifeguarding course, I had to pull a 200-pound boy out of the pool in an exercise to practice using our legs when lifting. I, being only 90 pounds, tried pulling and ended up falling into the pool, landing with my lady parts on his face. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Today, I saved a woman from drowning at a pool where I lifeguard, but when I got her out of the water she started screaming about sexual assault. Apparently I accidentally brushed her breasts when pulling her up and out of the water. She wants to sue me. FML
Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML
Today, while taking part in a lifeguarding exercise, I was supposed to "drown" to get another guard to save me. After all was done, my boss called me into his office and screamed at me for "drowning the wrong way," and threatening our reputation. FML
Today, while lifeguarding, I slipped and fell from my chair and onto the cement. Embarrassed and actually quite hurt, I tried to climb back up to the chair, but it tipped. I fell half onto the cement half into the pool, just before the chair landed on top of me. FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML
Today, I was at my lifeguarding exam. Everything was going well until I went to 'save' someone and slipped and bellyflopped into the pool. I broke my toe, and the person I was supposed to save ended up saving me instead. FML
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Top comments
shotgunner2 0
hahaha i hope the people tying you down were chicks in bikinis
seb12992 0
Ouch. Were you being strapped down by a group of hot girls?
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Comments (218)
rossisthebest4 0
gay
leero 0
HAH. I'm a lifeguard and I've seen a ton of guys have that happen to them at inservice and stuff. I think it's funny every time :) no worries though cause apparently it's really common?
vampirate 0
yup, this happened to almost every guy in my lifeguarding class, because we all had to take turns being strapped to the board. let me tell you, AWKWARD...
canadiangirl007 0
Yup. I have seen it a million and ten times also. I think it was the funniest though when it happened to my boyfriend. He was so embarrassed. But I think it is totally naturally for this to happen to a guy. I mean you have a lot of woman running around in bathing suits leaning over top of you, and basically grinding against you when they are "saving" you.
DaBoss90 0
Depends on who your peers were. If it were guys, then you fail. If they were girls then who cares.
wienerwagon 0
How do comments like this pass without notice but entire flame wars start in any FML about homosexuality?
shotgunner2 0
are you a homosexual?
FmyLion 0
yay gay bashers! kiss me I'm bisexual!
WhiteDelight 4
too bad no one else's hands were around to help you charm that snake.
metheonlyb 17
hahaha!! I died at this!!
LebChickOnFira 0
LOl jokes its ok were only human. Some girls might actually get turned on hah
Loser390 0
Lifeguard: Ok class what have we learned about swimming. Kid: We learned Joe is into BDSM.
itomxp 0
LOOL
dinosaursmoo 0
Whats BDSM?
Check_Mate 0
Bondage Domination Sado-Masochism The person is excited by whips, chains, and/or ropes.
arienh4 0
Actually, it's bondage and discipline, dominance and submission and sadism and masochism. A very interesting acronym.
regalarius 0
Wow, that's awesome. Being tied down will do that to a guy, or at least to me, in the best of circumstances. Having it done by multiple girls in swimsuits? You don't get an FML, buddy, I do for never having had that happen :'(
AarionHailey 0
LMFAO!
BlastBurnCrash 0
@ #8, guys can't help when they get erections sometimes. doesn't mean he's a horny guy.
lems18902 1
I think it depends how old the dude is. If he's like 14 that's pretty normal - 35 pretty creapy! Lol
OSU_girl 0
This has happened in every lifeguard class I've ever taught...I wouldn't worry about it.
plexico 4
I see someone who has a future in BONDAGE. Back in my day, they called it B&D (bondage and domination), is that term still in use these days? Anyway, those are some search terms you can use to find people who share your sexual interests. Good luck with that, you miserable, sniveling hunk of puke (I think that's a term of endearment for you people.)
DncrHap 9
Erm... harsh?
plexico 4
You see, if he were into B&D, that would be nice! (Do you not understand what a "term of endearment" is?)
Lonely_Lez 0
Just because someone enjoys bondage does not necessarily mean they enjoy being called insulting names, especially in non-sexual situations with complete strangers.