Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. This brings me bad news and good news. The bad news, I'm a vegetarian. The good news, I finally know why I've been craving Big Macs for the last two weeks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband asked me if I was really pregnant or if I was just smuggling cheeseburgers. I'm now referred to as "the hamburgler." I'm only 5 months pregnant. FML
Today, after extensive tests due to pregnancy-related issues, I've been told my diet must change. I can no longer eat salt, sugar, gluten, or meat, and lactose is questionable. The doctor hopes it will end after the birth. Seven months to go. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. The kicker is, I'm 5 months pregnant and didn't even know it - no symptoms, nothing. I thought it was weight gain due to antidepressants and I'm also dealing with financial issues. I'm too far along to get an abortion, and adoption is not an option. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I also found out that the dad has a fiancée. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML
Today, after being a vegetarian for 5 years, I found out that my boyfriend of 2 years has secretly been feeding me meat. His reason is that he thinks it's "funny" that I still call myself a vegetarian afterwards. FML
Today, the good news is that my girlfriend is pregnant. The bad news is that twins run in her family. Worse, so do triplets, and I just recently lost my job. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
thefmlman2011 37
Phoebe? Is that you?
Fergus52 16
Sounds like your body is craving a meaty protein rich burger to help give your baby all the nutrients it needs. But if your going to break your vegetarianism, you can do so much better than Maccas.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (9)
SquirrelRulingtheWorld 8
Congratulations! You can totally make a veg version of a Big Mac at home.
thefmlman2011 37
Phoebe? Is that you?
Fergus52 16
Sounds like your body is craving a meaty protein rich burger to help give your baby all the nutrients it needs. But if your going to break your vegetarianism, you can do so much better than Maccas.
BurnInDemonFire 39
If you want to raise your kid as a vegetarian, I'd suggest stuffing yourself with Big Macs until you give birth. My mom craved minted lamb when she was pregnant with me, and I've never been able to stand it.
Roxy Rousseau 11
This isn’t the first time I’ve heard of vegetarian/vegan moms having meat cravings during their pregnancy. Some just “give in” to what their body wants for the baby and then go back to being meatless after the birth
Charlie Given 28
this is just nature's way of saying you need meat to survive and be healthy and remember you cannot put a child on a vegetarian diet otherwise they will end up with a bunch of health issues
diraven 15
Maybe you're just fat
Bubbilility 27
Might be a sign of a deficiency. Consult a doctor, obgyn, dietician, registered medical professional etc. If you want to continue your lifestyle then you'll probably have to find a lot of suitable substitutes since a baby takes one hell of a toll on your body.
Yummi_913 18
I second this. I lean toward a vegetarian diet just out of interest for those kinds of foods, but whenever my b12 dips I constantly crave massive burgers and steaks. It became a constant thing when I was pregnant too because my deficiencies were way more prevalent.
Elizabeth Voegel 3
I'd recommend talking to your doctor about this. it may seem silly, but pregnancy cravings are usually because your body needs something specific that that food has, probably protein this case. Your doctor should be able to tell you some vegetarian-friendly alternatives or tell you how to safely start eating meat again (going from eating no meat to eating meat suddenly can actually make you pretty sick).