Bad sandwich, bad week

By Anonymous - 07/09/2019 12:02 - Korea Republic of

Today, I went to the doctor's. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

agreeclassic 1 807

vote type 1 114

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

Downhill

By loveinanelevator - 13/02/2012 12:03

Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML

agreeclassic 38 717

vote type 1 2 696

Healthy lifestyle tips

By middleagednurse - 04/10/2017 23:37

Today, I spent 5 hours in the emergency room for what I thought was heavy bloody diarrhea. After having various implements and doctors' fingers shoved up my ass, it turns out I was only shitting out the family-sized bag of red spicy cheese curls I had eaten for lunch. FML

agreeclassic 1 588

vote type 1 4 150

Nice.

By poururheartout - 27/07/2018 20:30

Today, I went to the ER as I have an ulcer and I was exhibiting signs of a perforation. This is when the gorgeous doctor told me he had to stick his finger up my butt to check for rectal bleeding. FML

agreeclassic 3 290

vote type 1 407

By Numbass123 - 04/05/2014 17:17 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I was glued to the toilet all day, gushing fountains of crap, due to my own bad cooking. It got so bad that I ran out of toilet paper and had to desperately jump in the shower and stay there for nearly two hours. I can't even feel my own asshole any more. FML

agreeclassic 45 462

vote type 1 11 666

Ring of fire

By Anonymous - 18/05/2022 16:00 - South Africa

Today, I had bad diarrhea. I went to the toilet seven times while my cousins came to spend time with me. I spent more time in the toilet than I did with them. Once they'd left, I went to the toilet for what would be the eighth time in a couple of hours. I now can no longer feel my ass. FML

agreeclassic 853

vote type 1 119

Bunged up

By P DarklyKira - 18/05/2020 23:00

Today, after weeks of quarantine, I can finally go to the hospital to get my haemorrhoid surgery, which was confirmed. I have a big internal one. I didn't not consult with the same doctor as before, but he didn't even do a check up inside and told me, "You have nothing, go home." I can't shit. FML

agreeclassic 1 719

vote type 1 186

By fulloshit - 28/11/2010 02:17 - United States

Today, I woke up with extreme stomach pains. After being rushed to the hospital and having numerous tests performed, I was told my intestines were over-stretched with stool. I'm essentially so full of shit it hurts. FML

agreeclassic 36 090

vote type 1 4 602

Leaked

By Morgan Bailey - 18/09/2018 14:00

Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML

agreeclassic 2 772

vote type 1 905

Ring of fire

By Anonymous - 26/03/2023 12:00 - United States - Ardmore

Today, I have a bad case of diarrhea. The worst part isn’t even sharting in bed while sleeping naked. It’s the severe asshole pain from having to wipe my ass twenty times in twelve hours. FML

agreeclassic 732

vote type 1 165

By John - 24/06/2011 07:17 - United States

Today, I had my anus probed twice by two different doctors. I was diagnosed with hemorrhoids. I'm a 22 year old guy and have to schedule a colonoscopy for next week. I guess there's a first time for everything. FML

agreeclassic 31 138

vote type 1 3 433

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 7 September 2019 17:25

Sounds like a ssshh... ...wait on it... ...real pain-in-the-ass! The classic misdirection.

BurnInDemonFire 35

Sunday 8 September 2019 2:23

What a load of crap.

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 7 September 2019 17:25

Sounds like a ssshh... ...wait on it... ...real pain-in-the-ass! The classic misdirection.

BurnInDemonFire 35

Sunday 8 September 2019 2:23

What a load of crap.

Mark W. Noonan_969479943 5

Sunday 8 September 2019 11:00

Ha! 😂 Ha! 😂 Ha! 😂 Ha! 😂 Ha! 😂 Ha! 😂

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I'm depressed because my long-time dentist, who I've had for nearly two decades, is retiring and I'm having my last appointment with him. It's also depressing that one of my only meaningful relationships is with my dentist. FML

agreeclassic 436

vote type 1 147

Today, I learned that I have carpal tunnel syndrome. I got it from playing too much World of Warcraft. I got a disease in real life by living in a virtual world. FML

agreeclassic 30 161

vote type 1 151 598

Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML

agreeclassic 43 099

vote type 1 3 726

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

agreeclassic 48 942

vote type 1 7 109

Today, I stepped outside my house for the first time in a year, trying to socialize again. I broke my leg. FML

agreeclassic 2 684

vote type 1 324

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, who has frequent night terrors, also sleepwalks. And apparently sleep-pisses on the bathroom rug. FML

agreeclassic 45 747

vote type 1 3 542

Similar FMLs

TOP COMMENTS

Comments