Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said, "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying, "I'm good" or, "I'm okay", I said, "I'm gay". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was working at my job as a cashier, checking out an elderly woman's groceries. She was very nice, and we chatted for a couple minutes. Once she had paid, she leaned close to me and said, very politely, "I'm so so sorry that I mistook you for a girl at first, young man." I AM a girl. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML
Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML
Today, I decided to do something nice and compliment a stranger. I told a girl that I liked her skirt and that it looked good on her. She just rolled her eyes at me and said, "I'm not gay". FML
Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML
Today, I was sitting in Walmart when I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with, "You know I'm a guy, right?" FML
Today, I saw an unbelievably cute guy. He caught my eye and began to walk towards me. I adjusted myself and flashed him a smile. He came up to me, smiled back, and said "Hi, do you have a minute for gay rights?" FML
Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML
Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML
Today, I went to a grocery store after work, exhausted. I nodded politely at a woman who smiled at me repeatedly. I realized at checkout she thought I was someone she knew. I nodded through a full conversation without knowing who I was pretending to be. FML
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Top comments
YDIdouche 0
AWESOME!
Aldrahil 0
... Nice one, Ace.
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Comments (204)
FTL 0
HAHAHAHAHA.
K2snow 0
if greeting people with "I'm gay" isn't an instant conversation starter, i don't know what is.
heyhoe_fml 0
lmaoo #10's right. she's automatically going to assume u said that because she's ugly
The_Suit_Guy 0
You could've just explained you meant gay as in happy. It's what I'd have tried.
MestizoFilipino 0
Yea, I hope you explained to her afterward that you meant good, or did what the guy above me stated.
average_girl 0
hahahahhahhahahah love this b/c i do this all the time... but nvr this bad bahahahah ur awesome!
dizzle_doneski 0
yep, your obviously gay if you can't talk to a girl
blablabla18_fml 0
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! That's amazing. I love it.
awkwardmuch0880 0
that's absolutely hysterical.
pernicious_pink 12
LOL! Awesome-ness!