Today, I was sitting in Walmart and I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with "You know I'm a guy right?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sitting in Walmart when I saw an attractive woman walking by. Being the single guy I am, I went up to her and asked if she needed help with carrying her groceries. She responded with, "You know I'm a guy, right?" FML
Today, I was working at my job as a cashier, checking out an elderly woman's groceries. She was very nice, and we chatted for a couple minutes. Once she had paid, she leaned close to me and said, very politely, "I'm so so sorry that I mistook you for a girl at first, young man." I AM a girl. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store when an elderly woman walked up to me and said, "Why can't every guy be as handsome as you?" I would have been flattered by the comment, if I was a guy. FML
Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said, "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying, "I'm good" or, "I'm okay", I said, "I'm gay". FML
Today, while I was shopping at a store with my friend, I noticed a cute girl smiling at us. My friend said, "She's all yours," and walked away. When I approached her, she asked me if my friend was single. FML
Today, I was at the store buying some feminine products. At the cash register, the clerk said to me "Dude, you know those are for girls right?" I am a 30 year old woman. FML
Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML
Today, I was walking to work and saw three guys sitting at a table outside. One of the guys looks at me and says to his friends, "That's the girl that works at the grocery store. She replaced the hot chick." The other two guys glared at me. FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML
Today, I tried to flirt with the supermarket cashier by saying, “Guess I’m buying enough food for two!” She smiled politely and said, “That’s nice. Will your wife help you carry it?” I said, “What wife?” only to realize I’d just exposed myself as a lonely man buying family-sized frozen lasagna. FML
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Top comments
anniedi 6
haha! I would love to see the look on your face!
Bofferding_fml 6
don't tell us you don't like that!
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Comments (180)
Bofferding_fml 6
don't tell us you don't like that!
Madmattmania 0
someone should come out of the closet
SunshineBoy21 0
So, being the single guy you are - you were cruisin' for chicks at Wal-Mart and the one that turns your head, had a penis and testicles. Hmmm interesting. It is all good my single friend, it's all good.
ScaughtieHolden 11
Maybe he had guy liner and long hair, and a rack. Oh and why were you just sitting in Walmart? Where do you even sit there?
CanadianChickie 9
The benches?
Rykier 0
My WalMart has benches. Don't you know, it's where all the cool kids hang out.
ydi_4_suking 20
OPs balls must be about to blow and causing his brain to see dicks as chicks now
techweed 12
f*ck you I'd be terrified, transsexuals scare the sh*t out of me
bubble25_fml 5
if he said he was a guy, then he wasn't a transsexual, smart one. the guy was just so androgynous that this types of things happen too often.
margie2194 12
haha I bet he did ;)
dperrier9 3
Ha gaaaaay
Ali_Br_fml 33
Ok, so you're attracted to males... At least you find out now. And there is nothing wrong with that. I have loads of gay friends, and they are pretty cool
Rykier 0
I can't say I've ever mistaken a dude for a woman. Might be just me.
sarapsosis 1
23- you should come to China, there's a lot of confusion over here... maybe not so much from the frontal view but definitely from the back ( " I like that girls purse... oh shit it's a guy?!?!!!) I'm not racist, it's just that this has happened to me and my friends so many times
Rykier 0
Well of course. Orientals all have that jet black hair, and the way some of them wear it makes you wonder.
Rykier 0
I meant to add how it's always straight. Because in the U.S., most men and woman don't have the same hairstyles.
sarapsosis 1
hair isn't really the issue, more to do with their clothes and their frame
Rykier 0
True. I guess since they usually only pro create with their own race their body styles haven't changed like in the U.S.
ImaginaryFoe 1
"Orientals"? You're a bleeding idiot.
ILoveEggnog 7
I believe the more widely accepted term that you are looking for is "Asians". Not Orientals.
MyDogTastesBad 0
Orientals i's actually another term used to describe Asians (I'm Korean). But not heard very often. And my stupid iPod keeps chaining is to i's.
Rykier 0
That's what the Asians at the china buffet in my town told my friend. They wouldn't hire him because he isn't "Oriental" their words. Would you prefer I use chink or fish head? Exactly. So I suggest you stfu.
hellogoodbye1996 6
kinda wondering why you and your friends go around, and amongst yourself, compliment women's accessories.
thesunsetglow_fml 8
ASIAN refers to the middle eastern races all the way across to the far eastern races. ORENTIAL is a term referring to people from the orient, Japan, china, Korea (not 100% sure where the line is drawn though, but it does not include the middle east). So there is actually a difference. Don't call people idiots when they have in fact used the correct term. It just makes you look ignorant.
BAMF18 0
you have disgrace my famiry. we sharr engage in combat!
anniedi 6
haha! I would love to see the look on your face!
ruben_A_ruiz 0
It was probably something like ¿,:'-
PeteyPablo12308 20
That's ******* awesome and hilarious.
lbf_fml 0
I second that!
sarapsosis 1
i third that
mendozaale 0
i fourth that
ABANDONFATEREMEM 0
I 5th that
shulgafish 0
moo
xXHIxxxHATERXx 2
roarrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!
leprachaun405 0
o.O
angela3222 0
c-c-c-c-combo breakkerrrr
DavLynn 4
the combo was broken by the moo.. nice try though
lonswt 0
ur hot
Bekll 31
Maybe was a transvestite then? Obviously wasn't a mtf since they are and say they are females.
lizamaphone 6
that or just a guy who apparently looks like an attractive woman.
cobra9313 0
how do u even make a mistake like that tho...
AceGthebest 16
You realize what you just said was transphobic and ignorant right?
a_girl_i_know 0
I would say eff the guy's life for looking like an attractive woman.
kingtz 6
I think he was actually trying to!
qwerty1990 0
you love a7x, and I love a7x, why don't you give me your email adress
Rykier 0
Ahhh, how charming. Not.
Jay1D 0
at least he doesn't look like a ugly one...
leprachaun405 0
Hahahaha I love weird/desperate people on websites trying to hook up with what seem to be "hot chicks" but since you will most likely never actually meet the person you will never know!!!!!!
77taylah33 0
hahahah lol maybe your attracted to guys without even knowing it!
paras0mnia 3
ydi, stalking people in walmart, hope you learned your lesson :P
ImaginaryFoe 1
I have to agree. Why were you just aitting around in a store? Were you waiting for the chance to be creepy?
RedPillSucks 33
Reminds me of aqualung Sitting in a walmart bench, eyeing pretty girls with bad intent.
fadingaway 17
More like **** his life for looking like a woman.
wisericky 12
why? he gets free drinks at the bar. and he can shout "i have a penis!"
junz_fml 0
Was he wearing a wig?