Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 5 year-old daughter saw me getting ready to sit down in a fold-out camp chair, and told me, with a big smile on her face, "Daddy, you're too fat to sit in that chair. You'll break it with your big butt." Out of the mouths of babes, I guess. FML
Today, while tucking my toddler in bed and telling her I love her, she responded with, "And I love your bouncy castle belly!" I know I'm overweight, but I didn't think I was that fat. FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, my 3-year-old daughter told me I was blocking her view of her puppy. She said, "Dad, your boobs are too long!" FML
Today, I was hanging out at a friend's house. Her adorable 5 year-old sister came up, gave me a hug, and said, "You're fat. When are you going home?" FML
Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML
Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML
Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks, "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML
Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML
Today, while at a restaurant, my 4 year-old son pointed at a lady and exclaimed, “Mom, her butt is even bigger than yours!” FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
FerrariCake 2
Kids call it like they see it. If you want someone to lie to you, ask an adult.
hXcsoccerplaya 0
well you are buddy. hit the gym.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (84)
chibikari 0
Don't worry! I love your boobies, too! XD
Propayne 0
Quick put down the donut!!!!!!
maria101 0
hey fatty mick fat fat wanna twinkie?:D come on i kno u want it no? how bout this *gets a giant thing of ice cream* mmmm ice cream yeaaa u like it dont u mmmm good boy*pets*
missgreenday 0
Now that's funny.
Residence_fml 4
even kids can point out facts
jts2 3
That's cute. If your kid likes it, you shouldn't be upset.
Sarunas23 0
Well its nothing to worry about. i mean your kid is probably say things like "****","shit"when he's 7-10 years old. thats the world now :/ ;(((
Bob31_fml 4
if you don't like being fat, do something about it. In the meantime, your kid was saying she loves you how you are.
GingerSwede 0
Take it as a compliment! ;D
blastvortex 4
Aw, that's sweet. ^_^ If you don't like it, dood, then lose the chunkage.