Today, there was a luncheon at work in another dept. We all went to get some free food and see new faces. There was a hot girl walking around chatting. I grabbed my buddy's arm and told him there was a "nice pair of tits here." He saw her. She's his daughter. She's a new-hire… running HR. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my company was having a huge party so I went to work dressed in my best outfit. During lunch break, my boss said to me, "You really missed out on something yesterday, it was great fun!" FML
Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML
Today, I finally got a date with one of the hottest girls in school, a perfect 10. Just before I go to pick her up to go to the movies, I called her to find out where she lives. She answered the phone, only to hear my father yelling in the background, "STOP TALKING TO THAT WHORE." FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a fancy restaurant. My date was running a bit late, so I went ahead and got a table. I got bored, so I decided to ask my waiter how I looked. He stood there, then said that, "It's against company policy to mock customers to their face." FML
Today, I overheard my boss stressing out over finding a replacement for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML
Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML
Today, as I waited to fly home, a very attractive woman smiled and gestured towards the seat next to me. However, a hyperactive child and his mother barged past into said empty seats. The woman really hit it off with the guy behind, while I was stuck listening to a kid scream at Angry Birds. FML
Today, I went to Cheesecake Factory for dinner. There was a hot waiter who kept passing by. He saw me looking at him and I knew I had to say something. So when he approached my table I asked, "Excuse me, do you have any salt?" and he said, "I think it's right there on the table." FML
Today, a kid on a bike passed me and commented on my "big fat butt." Recognizing him from the neighborhood, I told my husband to go speak to his parents about the inappropriate comment. It turns out his father is the man who yesterday commented on my "big bouncing tits." FML
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Top comments
greenfairy_fml 0
you're lucky, if a coworker said that to my dad about me, he'd kick his ass. and yeah, you totally deserved it for referring to her that way.
Hullaballoo 0
Wow, I hope you know now that referring to women by their body parts isn't ok
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Comments (64)
Edmund_Dantes 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
To hell with all the overly-sensitive women calling you a misogynist. You like ****, who doesn't? You didn't say it to her face, or tell her to get you some coffee, you said something to a friend. However, since the girl was presumably young enough to be your daughter, you are a creepy bastard.
AvengingAngelx 20
'To hell with all the overly sensitive women.' Saying that in itself is a rude, sexist comment. Some of us feminists who are saying that it's not okay to refer to a woman, or anyone for that matter, by their body parts have been sexually mistreated before. And if you don't see how making comments like that is perpetuating rape culture (and just plain wrong), you need to go and do a bit of research.
yui567 0
I agree with #7. Also, how did you not know his daughter was going to work for your firm? You should be more careful.
tech_guy 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I hope your friend is man enough to admit that his daughters got a nice rack. Tough to say who is in the right here without actually seeing the headlights in question
z0iid 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
meh. it was funny. obviously the guy (dad) he said it to, has been open to similar conversation in the past. this time, it happened to be his daughter. so what. my girlfriend likes it when i tell her she has "nice ****". girls who don't like the attention, tend to dress modestly. those who don't dress modestly, know what kind of attention they will receive. my girlfriend chooses to dress however she feels based on the day. some days - showing some of that great cleavage, other days, sweatshirts.
balboababe 0
pedofile
Jimmy_fml 0
sux. girls do this all the time about guys used to hear it from the cubicles behind me so don't feel alone. The girls calling you names are just hypocrites.
0___0 9
I would have moved my finger a little to point at someone else >_> "NOT HER.. herrrrrr" ;P
effmalyfe 0
Kinda awkward for the dad if he wants to file a complaint.
Shia_fml 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
:)Why is everyone downing on him... Im a girl I have nice boobs... I sit with my brother, and cousins and friends, who are guys and they say the same stuff, it is just a typical guy thing to say. I personally find it offensive when guys say it too me... because saying to my face makes me feel funny like I doubt this gentlemen would have said that to her face honestly, he was just passing a guy remark to another guy, if that was not her father then the guy would have most probably agreed that the girl is as we say "thick". :)It was an honest mistake... so hopefully you won't do that again. I need to show my guy friends this note, so they can take a lesson from it as well
gummibehrs 4
What are you, 12?
Javee 17
Your male family members comment on your breasts? Sounds creepy. Also, are you even old enough to be on this site?
muchlovezoe 0
did you proceed to ask him for her number? He probably has it, you know. Or perhaps your really lucked out and she still lives at home, in which case you can simply look up your friend's number and give the little lady a call. *wink* go get 'em tiger.