Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML
Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, I was taking my 3 month-old nephew for a walk in his stroller, when a lady stopped me to coo over him. Then she patted my stomach and said, "Don't worry, you'll lose the baby weight soon." I've never had a baby. FML
Today, I was teaching my one year-old some new words. He pointed to the picture of a pig and said, "Mama". Guess I better start that diet. FML
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Today, in the middle of the store, my daughter pointed at my belly and loudly announced that she was going to have a brother. I'm a man, and apparently I need to lose weight. FML
Today, my 4 year old son told his preschool teacher that his daddy could pick up 10,000 cows but couldn't pick up his mommy because she was too heavy. I'm the mommy. FML
Today, I went to the store to get groceries. After getting all the stuff I need, and was heading towards the checkout point, I heard a baby cry and instantly felt coldness on my shirt. Yes I was lactating, and yes it was noticeable. FML
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
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Top comments
strawberry_78 0
Ah, I could understand his mistake, double meaning! You said it!!!
umlautasaur 0
I don't see how this is an FML. You have baby weight. Your husband isn't making a huge deal of it. BTW, "cow" is usually synonymous with being overweight. All mammals breastfeed.
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Comments (152)
blarg0_0 0
how is this bad? if you were just pregnant, you have weight. at least he was honest.
huntergreen367 0
wow, how did you expect him to take it. Cow has a general meaning and the one you meant was not even close to it. You should probably explain what you mean if you are going to use terms that have other meanings. Good for your husband for being a good enough guy that he tried to make you feel better.
eppie 0
well we dont think like that so he was just trying to be nice trust me
ObadiahtheSlim 2
He figured you were talking about baby weight. All women gain a bit after giving birth. Get over it.
pleasetryagain 0
#36- if she didn't consider it to be a terrible thing, then why put it on fml? The words "**** My Life" imply that something considerable has happened. Maybe we're getting terrible posts because people think that not knowing where your hat is for five minutes is an fml.
xO_starstruck_xO 0
your husbands funny!
kiltedwolf 0
Women always seem to complain about their weight, you can't fault a man for falling back onto what he knows. When ya leave the barn door open like that...
ZEROGage 0
At least the man tried to make you feel better... He could've just said 'yep- now go hit the gym tubby!'
normandin131 0
He was talking about the extra weight women put on after pregnancy. He wasn't calling you fat.
takran 0
Get over it, he was trying to be supportive.