Milkmaid
Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML
Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, I was taking my 3 month-old nephew for a walk in his stroller, when a lady stopped me to coo over him. Then she patted my stomach and said, "Don't worry, you'll lose the baby weight soon." I've never had a baby. FML
Today, I was teaching my one year-old some new words. He pointed to the picture of a pig and said, "Mama". Guess I better start that diet. FML
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Today, in the middle of the store, my daughter pointed at my belly and loudly announced that she was going to have a brother. I'm a man, and apparently I need to lose weight. FML
Today, my 4 year old son told his preschool teacher that his daddy could pick up 10,000 cows but couldn't pick up his mommy because she was too heavy. I'm the mommy. FML
Today, I went to the store to get groceries. After getting all the stuff I need, and was heading towards the checkout point, I heard a baby cry and instantly felt coldness on my shirt. Yes I was lactating, and yes it was noticeable. FML
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
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Top comments
strawberry_78 0
Ah, I could understand his mistake, double meaning! You said it!!!
umlautasaur 0
I don't see how this is an FML. You have baby weight. Your husband isn't making a huge deal of it. BTW, "cow" is usually synonymous with being overweight. All mammals breastfeed.
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Comments (152)
p00p0ster0us 0
Considering "cow" is a common pejorative women use toward one another, and given those women are not likely to be active in producing milk at the time the dart is thrown at them, you pretty much were telling him "I have a poor body image and life will suck forever so say something nice to me".
lifesagamble 0
His mistake is understandable.
xabringr 0
All right, whenever you ask a guy if you're fat, (if they're intelligent) they'll automatically say,"No, you're not." He thought you were asking if you were fat, so his reflex kicked in. You'll be thankful for it someday.
Troll_patrol 0
Ha ha...you're a cow.
yer_maw 1
At least he didn't respond with "I know" ¬_¬ then he'd just be calling you a bitch
pearls 0
Agree with #8. It's like when people describe fat people as "heifers" when a heifer is a cow. You really were setting a trap with that one.
Chaith 16
So this hormonal cow is trying to deny gaining any weight after passing a kid?
condescending 0
YDI when someone says "im such a cow" it usually means "im so freakin fat"
frozen_heart 0
yeah ydi...he wasn't even mean about it and you probably do need to drop some pounds considering you just gave birth and all, so you might want to get on that.
Wittlestalker 0
I don't see why you all are bitching over her "over-reacting." We have no idea what she did after that; all we know is that she posted an fml. :|