Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML
Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, I was taking my 3 month-old nephew for a walk in his stroller, when a lady stopped me to coo over him. Then she patted my stomach and said, "Don't worry, you'll lose the baby weight soon." I've never had a baby. FML
Today, I was teaching my one year-old some new words. He pointed to the picture of a pig and said, "Mama". Guess I better start that diet. FML
Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML
Today, in the middle of the store, my daughter pointed at my belly and loudly announced that she was going to have a brother. I'm a man, and apparently I need to lose weight. FML
Today, my 4 year old son told his preschool teacher that his daddy could pick up 10,000 cows but couldn't pick up his mommy because she was too heavy. I'm the mommy. FML
Today, I went to the store to get groceries. After getting all the stuff I need, and was heading towards the checkout point, I heard a baby cry and instantly felt coldness on my shirt. Yes I was lactating, and yes it was noticeable. FML
Today, we ran out of milk and my 4 year-old son came up to me and asked if he could "milk" my wife's breasts for his cereal. Apparently, he thinks my wife doesn't love him and his sister is selfish for not sharing her milk. His sister is only one month old. FML
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Top comments
strawberry_78 0
Ah, I could understand his mistake, double meaning! You said it!!!
umlautasaur 0
I don't see how this is an FML. You have baby weight. Your husband isn't making a huge deal of it. BTW, "cow" is usually synonymous with being overweight. All mammals breastfeed.
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Comments (152)
ik_im_not_funny 0
well he meant it in a good way, since most woman refer to their weight often he probably assumed youwere, especially since there probably is a little "baby fat" left from the pregnancy and the term cow is commonly used to describe big or fat. so at least you have a husband who tried to make you feel better
Blindrage6 0
I'm sure he meant nothing by it. Most men try to stay on the good side of women, so when he said that, he isn't saying he thinks you're fat. He's saying he doesn't think you're fat, he just wants to avoid telling you that you aren't, so you don't scream at him. Either way, don't be offended. We men try everything we can to say the right thing. We sometimes just....fail
HyperExecuter 0
he was just trying to make u feel better... if u were pregnant u should not care about your weight anyways
me5 0
...and possibly fat
forensicsbatch 0
Kinda set yourself up for that one
budster1993 2
MOOO!!!!!!!!
ridder215 7
"Hey dear, I'm a cow!" Doesn't make sense.
Sober1128 9
how is this an FML? most guys would think that that's what you meant because of the weight you gained while pregnant. stop being so damn sensitive.
mersade 0
Damn I hope my husband doesn't say that to me if I ever say that to him once I have my baby. :/
predavlad 3
You set the joke up for him, he couldn't help it :)