Today, my boyfriend fingered me. He never cuts his nails. It felt like I was getting intimate with Wolverine. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML
Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend when he reminded me that I needed to cut my toe nails. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML
Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate with each other, starting with some foreplay. Before he fingered me, he put on a blue surgical glove, claiming that "down there is dirty and smelly" and he didn't want it on his hand. FML
Today, I had to take my boyfriend to the emergency room to get stitches from cutting his arm during sex. I sat there while he explained to the doctor how it was the best orgasm ever. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate in an alley. He pushed me up against a wall and started kissing me, but he pushed me so hard I cut open my head and needed 10 stitches. FML
Today, when my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I got a nose bleed. He gave me a shirt to plug it with and kept going. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my fingers got stuck between the wall and headboard. Screaming, he thought I was enjoying the sex and kept going even harder. I have 3 broken fingers. FML
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Top comments
yellowboy30 0
my nails r cut. let me try
JesseOhNine 0
yuck
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Comments (338)
jealouswaugh2424 0
I cut my nails BECAUSE of that reason
BobbieH 19
You deserve it for not telling him no until he cut those nails!
McLovin1095 5
That sucks, however you do have the right to say get your claws out of my ******
AboveTheRest 6
and if you knew that why would you let him do that to you?
creedaddict 9
ewww .... u know his fingers are like that why let him ydi ... my BF is a roofer with the most dirty hands u even seen I would never let him put this hands in my pants
delilahtealight 0
I know how u feel. it hurts like hell
stallion2521 0
he's the best at what he does and what he does isn't nice
brunettegurly 0
THAT HAPPENS TO ME AHHH. I had to give him a pedicure cuz he made me bleed/:
raphanne_fml 33
Did he make you bleed with his feet?
redbluegreen 41
You people and your feet fetishes. :|
life2007 0
think you mean mani not a pedi... :)but Ive had that happen the guy didn't even have long finger nails it just caught right it was a epic fail
brunettegurly 0
hahahaha I just noticed I said pedicure..:P
BigRizzie 0
Lol you must like it you didnt tell him to stop.
scippy 0
except wolverine is awesome and ur boyfriend is prob not!