Today, I met a guy that I liked. We really hit it off, that is until his parents walked by and he started begging them, down on his hands and knees, to buy him a new video game. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at a dinner with my dad's girlfriend's family. I met this guy who I found kind of cute and tried to talk to him a couple times. To avoid talking to me he started playing his PSP. I could see the screen perfectly and the PSP was clearly off. FML
Today, I find video games very unattractive and unmanly. I told a great guy that he had to choose between me and his video games, and he immediately told me he chose video games, then asked me to leave. Whatever, loser. FML
Today, in an effort to try and be closer to my girlfriend's son, I bought him an expensive Xbox game I know he desperately wanted so we could play it together. He was excited, until he realised that I that paid for it. He snapped the disc and threw the pieces in the bin. At least I tried. FML
Today, my dad called, saying he was in town and that he wanted to see me. I was excited, thinking he wanted to come see my new apartment. Turns out he just wanted to borrow my Xbox. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over the phone. He said there was someone else, and that he has been in love with her for a while. Turns out, the new girl was his online video game character. I got dumped for a video game. FML
Today, I beat my boyfriend in a video game. He promptly dumped me and told me to leave. FML
Today, I walked in on my son teabagging his sister over a video game. FML
Today, I realized that my ex has REALLY dumped me for a video game. And he will not change his mind. FML
Today, when I got home, the apartment was clean for once. I gasped in surprise, and my boyfriend came out of the bathroom, carried me to the bedroom, and brutally ravished me. Afterwards, I asked him what brought this on. "Well, I bought a new game and it took forever to download..." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad, who it turns out is such an anime nerd he decided to overplay the "idiot overprotective dad" character all afternoon, including making the dramatic faces, playing theme music from his phone, and at one point threatening my genitals with an oversized foam battle axe. FML
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Top comments
Jimboom 12
Well, on the plus point at least you know how to make him do whatever you want now. Just buy him a game, then let him play when he is good.. and take it away from him when he is bad, disobeys you, or if he fails to pleasure you. ;-)
caseyxoxo 0
So, did they buy him a new video game?
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Comments (59)
TheWhiteDemon 0
well, now you might not like him anymore so what.
MrSassypants 34
I wonder what he did when he came back to talk to OP again... :/
LiveThenDie 2
it depends on the game.
iampunk 0
So true LiveThenDie.
madarchod 0
it shows he loves and respects his parents. what's ur problem, OP?
KiddNYC1O 22
If it was COD Black Ops, can you blame him?
redgame_ftw 0
still i don't think he had to go on his knees for a game. he needs a job
Mehness 0
29 - I would still blame him.
Thawn 0
if it's Call of Duty: Black Ops then it is entirely understandable and you will forgive him and give him a bj while he is playing like every good gf should!
123zc1 3
Exactly what I was thinking.
zerobahamut03 2
Hey, you have to like someone in their good times and their embarrassing immature times. It's a guy...maybe he's comfortable in front of you. It might have been a awesome game that he's been wanting.
acccccccc 1
halo> cod :P
MissErikaHart 0
NBA 2k11
brightnite 0
Or....Or.....You now have the knowledge to completely control him.
karimkz 0
was it MoH?
Action_Bastard 0
If it was then I would understand. I bought my copy a day before the release date and I'm addicted to that game now. Pure awesomeness!!!
firecopy 6
medal of honor
tenroy_fml 0
no vanquish that s**t is epic
johndoe411 0
dude that the shit
biass 0
What are you guys taking about? Getting ass beats any video game, any day.
Cxhris 0
Dude When black ops comes out, i'm gonna have to say bye bye to ass for at least 2 weeks :)
dudeitsdanny 10
Everyone knows he wanted to reserve Pokemon Black/White, and OP should forgive him even when he imitates Pokemon cries in bed. Of course, I think I saw a Barbie game for DS on the New Releases shelf on Tuesday..
Cjw1220 0
FNV>MoH
queencitystoner 0
understandable, I guess I lucked out with my roommates.
HighStakes 0
MoH sucks. Just played it. Too call of dutyish, but worse. Just a cheaply made game...
HarvestTheSorrow 0
Call of Duty: Black Ops is going to be the Game of the Year, calling it right now...
El_patron 0
haha fail RDR is game of the year
Xxak907xX 0
I bought black ops. it's GAY
jdimaria3 13
completely agree
bamxitsxandreaa 8
this might sound weird since I'm a girl, but I actually like playing Call of Duty: Black Ops....haha.
Jimboom 12
Well, on the plus point at least you know how to make him do whatever you want now. Just buy him a game, then let him play when he is good.. and take it away from him when he is bad, disobeys you, or if he fails to pleasure you. ;-)
Tikwichka 5
^ This. Knowledge is power.
DarkHelmet 10
excellent logic my friend!!
juliansisle 5
rofl
qwertyqwer6302 0
riding on (a) flying llama
caseyxoxo 0
So, did they buy him a new video game?
perdix 31
I wonder what he'd do for a Klondike Bar! If you have some sort of sexual predilection that is too disgusting for anyone to do for you, you might have found your man.
redbluegreen 41
If that's the case, the OP could just look on FML. We have stories from people that wet the bed, shit on their sleeping roommates, are Dutch oven enthusiests, sitophilics, and more.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
How could you have forgotten unicorn strap-on horn enthusiasts, rbg?!
DocBastard 40
Don't forget Grandma with the cherry "massage gel."
perdix 31
Blumpkin, anyone? I don't believe such a thing even exists. I think someone wrote it into Urban Dictionary as a goof and they fell for it. Have you or anyone you know ever been on either end of a blumpkin? I can envision a great comedy sketch where the receiver of a blumpkin has erectile dysfunction and constipation while the giver has chapped lips.
redbluegreen 41
I didn't forget, TIJD, I just wrote the comment in the middle of the night and listed a bunch of things, realized it was too long, and cut out all but the first four I had listed. Truthfully, Perdix, I can believe such things exist in real life because whether we like it or not, there are people into everything you can think of.
tyler004 0
perdix, I've heard of a girl offering that to one of my friends.. but ppl found out so nothing happened
fr33minded 0
give him a chance :)
Nyc__Princess 0
That's the type of guy who will live in his parents basement till he's the age of 50.
queencitystoner 0
nah chances are he'll realize how big of a loser he is then kill himself.
Nyc__Princess 0
Or he could want to act all mature & have sex in public.
queencitystoner 0
maybe, but chances are if he's, living at home with his parents he's not having sex lol and don't knock public sex til you've tried it
queencitystoner 0
and 18 nothing wrong with living with your parents while your in school(uni included) but if you're working full time and still can't sever the ties, that's kinna sad
pengiesully 0
yeah but now u know he's the one who will get on his knees
sapphirestar 0
I think the situation depends on the guy's age? Haha