Today, I found out I’m going to be a father, twice over, with two different women. Sisters, in fact. Only one of those sisters is my wife. Should I flee abroad, or walk calmly towards the firing squad straight away? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out I’m gonna be a father. One day, I accidentally walked in on my sister-in-law changing. For some reason I’ll never understand, we ended up having a quickie doggystyle and swore to not talk about it ever again. She’s now 6 weeks pregnant. I’m a dead man if my wife finds out. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Today, I got the official word my wife is pregnant. Her sister, who lives with us, is also pregnant. I'm stuck in an apartment with two women due in late 2012. FML
Today, I was told by my wife that we were going to be parents. We are both females. FML
Today, I found out my soon-to-be husband and father of my unborn child is already married to another man. FML
Today, my sister-in-law announced that she’s pregnant. With my kid. And the doctor thinks it might be twins. FML
Today, I found out wife has two baby daddies for our two kids. I’m neither one’s baby daddy. FML
Today, due to my parents divorcing 30 years ago, marrying other people, and giving me a handful of half siblings, I found myself in the uniquely unpleasant situation of walking in on my sister having sex with my brother. (Stop panicking, they’re not blood related to each other, work it out!) FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I also found out that the dad has a fiancée. FML
Today, I found out that me and my best friend are both pregnant. We live together, and both had one night stands with the same guy. Now we are going to be each raising his children in the same house while he has decided to "not get involved" and move to a different state. FML
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Top comments
Anderling 33
So you ****** your wife’s sister and knocked her up, permanently shattering their family relationship the second your wife finds out, and you’re seriously here to whine for sympathy? Dude.
RichardPencil 32
Stick around and be ready to be called "Uncle Daddy." Living with your mistake is probably the most fitting punishment.
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Comments (23)
Dumbum123 19
Man, you are the epitome of trash. The **** were you thinking? Oh, wait, you were thinking about yourself, you self-centred prick.
Silver_helmet 10
How did you even get there ? One was stupid to marry someone like you, the other one for wanting the jerk her sis had (yes I'm talking about you). Both deserved a lot better
Aiden89 23
Talk about shooting yourself in the foot
Lydmyers 9
neither. you should take whatever shit they give you, and also pay child support. YDI.
bobsanction 18
Flee to Nepal, live as a goat. It's your only option.
Brightside86 31
Seems like a humble brag. Obviously try and be the best dad you can treat others like you would have them treat you. Life's objectives haven't changed you've just unlocked a secret hand mode option.
the_catherine 9
F off, man. Wth were you thinking??
an_average_guy 6
Cheap flights to Mexico. I suggest body-armor until then.
rotflqtms_ 21
Walk calmly to your death. You deserve it for cheating. YDI for cheating with your wife's sister. YDI YDI YDI. F your wife's life for having a cheating husband and a bad sister.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
If you're posting this on FML, it sounds like you're already heading for the firing squad. But in all seriousness, YDI. It's bad enough that you cheated on your wife, but you did it with her sister AND with no protection. You are a huge part of what's wrong with society.