Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked a buddy of mine if he wanted to go see a movie. He said he was busy, so I decided to go alone. Midway through, the couple behind me was making out and kicking my seat. I turned around, and it's my ex-girlfriend making out with my buddy. FML
Today, I witnessed my girlfriend and best "friend" getting intimate. In a dim-witted attempt to cover up, my best friend proclaimed, "This isn't what it looks like!" I might have given him the benefit of the doubt, had he not still been inside my girlfriend at the time. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were at the movies. When the "love scene" came on, she leaned over and made out with the wrong man. FML
Today, I went to the movies with a girl I like, then we went to grab a bite afterwards. She spent most of the time telling me how much she dislikes my best friend because he hooked up with a new girl. I then found out the two had been "talking" for a while. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been sleeping around. After telling my best friend, I also found out that he and a few others have known for the past month. He asked, shocked, "Dude, I thought you knew?" FML
Today, I went to the movies with my friend and two pretty girls. During the movie, he made out with both of them, while I sat there awkwardly and watched the movie. FML
Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend, when I had to go pee. Halfway down the aisle, I tripped, screamed, and fell face-first into some guy. My boyfriend is now accusing me of cheating and "flirting" with every man I see. FML
Today, I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were three girls loudly discussing blowjob techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was, "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML
Today, I went to the movies alone after the boy I was seeing told me he was busy studying for exams. I found him making out with another girl whilst in the queue. When I confronted him by text, he denied that it was him. I saw him check the text and reply. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went to the cinema. Or rather, she went with her other boyfriend, and I happened to see them there. FML
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Top comments
Renesaga 8
Uh.. well.. at least you caught her in the act! You go, OP! If she would lie to your face like that, honestly, you're better off without her. And no, I'm not just saying that.
mariah_2014 0
Bitches
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Comments (323)
mariah_2014 0
Bitches
asoptavlo14 6
Be crazy.
auzz1_pride 9
I wonder if this was the first time. Its a shame op can't put more detail in :S
reddawn1985 12
At least he'll get a zit dick from the butter off the popcorn.
syki 22
If you take them to the cinema, they ain't shit but hos and Twix. Probably over-priced, too.
Airman1988 9
That was a pretty bold move on both their parts, obviously she's a ho and his best friend has no honor
Forlorn420 9
This shouldn't be an FML. You should be glad to get rid of the cheating bitch
ihatethesenamez 6
Lucky friend
PenguinSwag47 0
I can only imagine how pissed you must've been. I feel for ya OP.
mars13_fml 8
No more like bitch and bastard :p or just assholes.
ladyLALAA 29
**** bitches. Get money.
KairoFallin 0
You listen to too much Lil Wayne ^ High five bro!
Just_STFU_Please 13
That's no best friend. You should have done something right there and then and left them there.
IworkAt711 14
If they start going out, she'll do the same to him.
pfx2_fml 15
******* ******
pfx2_fml 15
******* ******
ladyLALAA 29
125 you should be slapped for that comment.
ThisIsMyReign 4
OP you let them continue? As soon as you saw that you should have started fighting your ex-bestfriend and slap the shut out of your ex-girlfriend. Normally, I wouldn't say hit a girl but that's going too far. So hit both bitches!
zihsuan 1
Shouldn't she be the one that became single after that?
xxmel 6
Usually when two people break up, they BOTH become single..
hahafylop 4
I expect the girl isn't single now. She may have OP's best friend as a girlfriend now.
Factor_fml 6
No, she has his best friend.
zihsuan 1
It sounded like OPs girl broke up with him instead of the reverse occurring. That's the point I was trying to make.
Abdul888 16
6 no, she is now a couple with the OP's best friend, and the op is a couple with his hands ;)
peoplearestupido 0
this has to be the dumbest comment i have ever seen.
auzz1_pride 9
Not the dumbest 44, but pretty close
lonkite101 14
13- you mean boyfrieb
philbelfrage 13
86 - you mean boyfriend
untamed112 0
Your retarded
Pandacupcakelove 26
111- says the person who doesn't even know the difference between "your" and "you're"....
OneLittleAdditio 9
wow 111 you really have to say retarded? It's insensitive people like u that make this world just a little worse every day.
ohmandapants 17
^ mentally retarded is a medical term. Not insensitive. Of course, people tend to use it rudely and improperly, but the term itself is a real medical term.
hatesfate 6
118 - you say insensitive people make the world worse every day, I say overly sensitive people do. Bullying, teasing, and general idiocy has gone on for centuries yet it's only recently that it's become a "problem"?
OneLittleAdditio 9
its always been a problem. its just that the internet and media has helped spread the word faster when kids and teens commit suicide over it. or even are just emotionally damaged. the problem has always been there.
OneLittleAdditio 9
well I meant what u said. my brother is severely mentally retarded I understand what it means it just upsets me when people use it to describe ignorant and stupid people. its insulting and insensitive.
lopsop 12
STOP YELLING!!!!
ChickInGreenVans 12
If you scrolled up i think you'd actually see that you're the one yelling..
doctorhook86 25
163: Get outta here, ya troll! Remember the golden rule: treat others the way you want to be treated. Do you want to be teased and bullied?
Alan2 24
Did Samuel L. Jackson just quote the bible?
missymay993 11
224- Frankly, I wouldn't care. It's expected in the real world and if you're so thin-skinned that you can take a little teasing, then you won't survive in any sort of occupation. People don't care about a stranger's feelings. You gotta get over it. And I am willing to bet that all these "anti-bullying advocates" have at some point made someone feel like shit. It's human nature to assert dominance. We can't keep eliminating our instincts or our society is going to become a bunch of fluffy, weak, jello people. That's when the apes take over...
MissMae93 23
227 - It's scary how similar our usernames are... Copycat! ;)
fireclaw722 3
There's a fine line between being bullied and being teased. Bullying is with malicious intent, whereas teasing is just poking fun. I think you better learn the difference.
yoyoforpeace 14
WHAT.A.****.
untamed112 0
115&118 yeah do you have a problem you are RETARDED
ohmandapants 17
^Trying to be a big shot over the Internet. I bet my 11 year old sister could beat your ass. Shut up
rdrr 2
^ I betcha my 3 month old fetus could kick your 11 year old sister's ass.
efemel94 7
Some people are so easily offended these days. You can't say anything without someone whimpering about it...
Ajwc101 24
227 - Are you saying its ok to bully!? If so then God have mercy on you.
efemel94 7
Point proven
LMFAOallthetime 8
I think bullying isn't okay, but joking around with another friend is fine when they know your just kidding.
hahafylop 4
Yes, I did mean boyfriend. Not boyfrieb, not girlfriend. Yet even with my error and someone else's failed correction, you understood it.
perdix 31
Just turn down the volume on your computer and everything will be OK.
Zfontaine04 8
From handjobs to bullying... That takes skill
XxpoopdoggyxX 0
Hmmm you are retarded I bet you are in a wheelchair and have downs you dumb ****? Consider yourself trolled.
Karalela44 15
Idiots...idiots everywhere
brand2017 9
Its amazing how much butthurt can arise over the use of a single word. Sticks and stones fellas. Never heard of it? Well ill summarize- A word is a word. Who gives a flying **** nugget if its "politically correct" or not? Its a word! Not a knife!
Renesaga 8
Uh.. well.. at least you caught her in the act! You go, OP! If she would lie to your face like that, honestly, you're better off without her. And no, I'm not just saying that.
happle 21
Right next to OP, too.. That's just not right.
Renesaga 8
My point exactly. Cheating: horrible. Cheating right in front of the person: inexcusable.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
3 is completely right. OP, she's a lying *****. I promise there's girls not like that in this world! Just keep looking! :)
thisisafunnyname 12
At least she didn't say that she mixed OP and his friend up.
KMtheDrummer 6
Honestly, it doesn't sound like OP runs with a great crowd...
evig_fml 16
102- Actually it was her left hand she was using :D *slaps himself for being a troll*
Isoldael 27
110- I'd rather have my bf cheat right in front of me and know about it than behind my back. At least I could do something then. But yea... Inexcusable.
tjv3 10
Please tell me that you ditched the best friend too
iPsycho 4
Thats awful....
Angel157 8
No sh*t Sherlock
Trisha_aus 15
Sherlock solves much more complicated mysteries
eddeeezzyy 19
I don't get people that put an asterisk on a cuss word. I mean...just say the entire ******* word. ****, it's not like the FM ******* L police is going to ******* punish you for that. ****.
Gregory607 1
113, that is my fave meme.
mars13_fml 8
That's an understatement
BigShOtz07 5
Still a better love story then twilight
DracoSpirita 21
What isn't a better love story than Twilight?
jaredofmo 22
Twilight slashfic. That's a worse love story than Twilight.
pottymouthpanda 0
Redditor? :O But honestly, your better off OP. At least now you can really find someone who deserves your attention, even though it was a rough realization, it'll get better (:
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
*than
Spiral_Thoughts 19
#36 Actually that sounds pretty interesting . . .
maz255 10
Twilight the XXX parody...oh god...
Da_Gr8_JamDonut 1
Human centipede is a better love story than twilight
Yousuck24 21
I think Twilight is a better love story then 50 shades of gray...
aly88snts06 4
50 shades of grey was based on twilight
Kn0wledge123 21
The OJ Trail is a better love story than Twilight. At least all the characters had motivation and DEPTH.
Drew167 8
She's a liar and a cheater you can definitely do better then that she's not worth it.
NothernNightmare 18
Not to mention the lying asshole of a best friend!
nofearjenshere 12
7 - I'm trying to figure out your picture... I can't tell if I'm just seeing things or not.
GetKayotic 12
Major lying bitch. "Mopping up a spill"? More like CAUSING a spill.
trollcrusher 17
Nope, you're not seeing things... He looks kind of like an Auschwitz victim (please pardon my spelling if it was incorrect).
Pentium_4 27
i think it's funny when someone who has no picture at all criticizes someone elses picture
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
I don't think Auschwitz victims had abs. Or a tan.
SeedlessMe 13
139-- I think I see what you think you see as well. Is that what it looks like, 7? .....On second thought, never mind. I don't think I want to know
fat_snooki_lol 6
Mate. Don't be a pussy about it. Two less people that weren't genuine to you out of your lie. You should be thankful.
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Should of knocked that best friend out. I know I know that's not acceptable in society.
DeadxManxWalking 27
84- Even so, it's hard to hold anger inside
rbubbles 20
Very thankful. Fk them both off
onlychildFTW 34
8 is very right. Obviously she was a bad GF and him a bad friend.
OneGirlsLife 20
Better you be single then still going out with a tramp.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
At least she didn't mop up the "spill" with her mouth. Ah, **** it. I'd super glue a hot pink ***** to one of their cars. (this happened to me once)
Goatinsfriend 8
If I were you, I wouldn't want her after the way she gave your best friend a handjob.
DespairFaction 11
What if she gave him a hand job in a different way?
Michele2luv 8
Were you there? Was she doing it wrong? O_o
Jumpingmal2 7
I mustache you a question? I moo steak you a question? I must ache you a question? I must ask you a question! Aha! Knew i would get it sooner or later
OhimWilliam 1
Shit at least you broke up with her before getting serious.