Today, I was looking at old pictures with my mom and saw one of myself crying in kindergarten. I asked why I was crying. She said that was the day a boy kissed me on the cheek, and I thought I'd gotten pregnant. She then decided to give me the sex talk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was really excited because the girl I'd liked since freshman year asked me out. She came to my house and my mom decided to show her baby pictures of me with tampons up my nose because I'd had a nose bleed. Even worse, there was one picture of me when I was 15 doing the same thing. FML
Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML
Today, I told my friends I was kissed by a girl. They said "Yeah, probably by your mom." The sad thing is, they were right. FML
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I was getting it on with a girl I've been talking to for three months. She's a year younger than me and it was her first time. So, I went easy. After five minutes she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said that I reminded her of her dad. FML
Today, my 11-year-old son and I were going through some old photos. He saw one of me when I was 22 on a beach, wearing a bikini. He said "Wow! Who's that?" Quite proudly I said it was me. He looked at me and said "What happened?" FML
Today, I sat my mom down to tell her I was pregnant, but before I could say anything, she started to lecture me on safe sex. I don't see this ending well. FML
Today, I took a pregnancy test. When I saw that the result was positive, I started crying and showed my mom. She burst out laughing and told me that I had taken an ovulation test. FML
Today, my mother had "The talk" with me about sex. I spent the entire time confused as to what brought this up, until she mentioned she had found a used condom in the backseat of the car. I haven't had any action in it, and have no idea whose it was. FML
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Top comments
_kyleG_ 34
At first, this sounded like she gave you the sex talk in kindergarten... I might be a bad person for this, but THAT would've been funny!
ktm71125 19
We all have weird stories from childhood OP! Except the sex talk might have been awkward.
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Comments (55)
feven 32
There's always a story behind every picture.
ktm71125 19
We all have weird stories from childhood OP! Except the sex talk might have been awkward.
JayGatsby 25
Exactly! I told everyone that I drank poison (I mispronounced the name of the drink), OP thought she was pregnant.... ahhh childhood. Anyways OP, FYL that must have been hella awkward.
MrConcise 35
My weird childhood story is that I had chicken pox, some of which were on my penis, and the medicine was incredibly similar to something I loved: Cream cheese. So I'd run around giggling like, "I put cream cheese on my penis!"
MrsDruidess 23
I also got the sex talk in kindergarten, it wasn't awkward, it was horrifying! Awkward is not really possible at 5 years old. 15 years old yes, but 5 is too young to really feel that mix of embarrassment and curiosity at that level. I mean we are still running aroung laughing at medicine on on penis with no shame at all ;-) right #41?
TeasinDaNoobs 16
Surely she could've thought of something else to come up with..
cheesyfeet2001 31
Better late than never op!
gearhead369 20
This is actually quite funny and cute tbh
mustangbravo 27
Did you try to stop her?
markotut 10
Well better now than never
DaEpicTaco 13
Haha lol
goozeo 11
Thanks for contributing to the conversation!
emeraldisle 30
Now seems like the perfect opportunity.
_kyleG_ 34
At first, this sounded like she gave you the sex talk in kindergarten... I might be a bad person for this, but THAT would've been funny!
Flyndaran 10
How so? You're supposed to give the sex talk long before puberty anyway.
1dvos_grl3 21
He meant in the kindergarten class #14
GigaPudding_fml 24
I don't see anything wrong with having an age appropriate sex talk with your kids when they're in kindergarten. The kids see pregnant women all the time and they're surrounded with other kids and babies, of course they're going to wonder where they come from!
bluefairy_fml 24
Wait, isn't that what OP meant? That she was crying in the picture because her mother had just given her the sex talk and she was traumatized?