Anonymous
United States
Lonely
Today, I left my empty shower running so I could pretend I didn't still live alone. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
liynda
Canada
Today, I knocked on the door of the bathroom to make sure nobody was in there before I walked in. Then I remembered I live alone. FML
Brendon
Spooky season ain't over
Today, I came home and heard the shower running. Assuming my roommate was in there, I yelled, “Don’t use up all the hot water!” Then my roommate walked in with groceries. I froze. The shower stopped. The bathroom was empty. Now I have to move out or start charging rent to a ghost. FML
Username
Today, my ex-girlfriend moved out. I came back to a sparsely furnished home; she'd even taken the shower head, my beard trimmer, and the soap from the bathroom. FML
lonesome
Pittsburgh, United States
Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML
wtfisgoingon
London, United Kingdom
Today, I was in the middle of having a shower when I noticed a camera hidden in the corner of the room pointing directly towards the shower which I stood in butt-naked. I live by myself and have recently only moved in. FML
Fire_Crotch
Canada
Today, I turned the shower on the hottest setting so it would warm up quickly. I started to sing and dance around the bathroom. I got too carried away and pelvic thrusted the water, which I hadn't turned back down. FML
youlovewaffles
Today, I was talking to myself in the shower, pretending I was Oprah. After I got out, my little brother asked if I was singing in the bathroom. I almost said no, but admitting to singing seemed a lot less embarrassing. FML
Jdogg
Home alone
Today, I was home alone, blasting music, dancing in my underwear, singing into a wooden spoon. I turned around mid-performance to see my landlord standing in the kitchen. I’d forgotten about the maintenance appointment I'd scheduled. FML
HomeAlone
United States
Today, I went into the bathroom and got angry upon finding that once again, no one had bothered to put on a new roll of toilet paper. And then I remembered that I live alone. FML
Diane
Toronto, Canada
Classic
Today, I pretended to be on the phone to avoid small talk with someone from my building. I spoke loudly into the phone while walking by them. My phone rang in the middle of my fake conversation. FML
Top comments
LawSixx 11
What a way to waste water as well.
kareltje 17
WTF? Don't be so selfish! Think about the environment, dude! ;) I'll get me coat...
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Comments (152)
jbones24 22
Aww man, that sucks. Check online for people looking for roommates?
daysgoby902 6
you're a wasteful child
ShroomsOnAcid 17
All he/she us bound to find is deranged psychos. Don't you know the internet is where all the creeps hang around?
gojira666 7
Thats the most pathetic thing ive ever heard
humorizer 14
Deranged psychos, eh? "Today, I finally moved in with my new roommate. I realized that she leaves the shower on when I'm not around because she gets lonely... I'm a tad bit worried about her now..."
ahti546 11
Now you're pathetic and a danger to the environment, congrats.
boofgall 16
How is op a danger? This seems pretty harmless, just silly.
dirtroadboy 7
1- Agreed. Talk to a friend of yours about moving in with you, or invite your friends over just to hangout after work or something.
humorizer 14
The commentator stated "danger TO THE ENVIRONMENT". Implying she's wasteful of natural resources, namely the chemical dihydrogen monoxide (a common ingredient found in tap water).
AlwaysCracked 6
DiHydrogen monoxide... So water? It's not too smart to just say water in a scientific way. Just kinda makes you look douchie.
Cryptic_Equinox 0
61, have you seen your picture? .. Or your username?
swoozie23 6
Forever alone? ... Someone had to say it
mattorama 15
That's where all the creeps are, like us? =P
MerrikBarbarian 9
Aye, that's what I plan to do. If I don't have a partner soon, I'll just share a place with some friends who are also single. Share resources, not waste them
Jovecove 13
foreveralone
xoconnie 8
how would that help??? were u trying to convince urself??? or someone else?
LawSixx 11
What a way to waste water as well.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
It would be acceptable if OP had a method of catching and retaining all the water for later use.
CheckItOutItsYou 7
^ like taking a bath
wholikesbacon 9
What is op?
smelly_turtle 2
56 - forever alone
EvilPotato 15
56 it means optimus prime.
IAMYOURPINEAPPLE 9
66- Thank you, I always thought it stood for original poster. How stupid of me.
GP14brBaller 5
Op is a ******.
Sweetheart34 2
yeah, were you trying to prove it to yourself or your water bill?
nikChick447 6
your from europe, arent ya?
jmtmxer 0
Is that why it says united states ? ^^
nighters 0
What a waste! Everyone knows you just leave the tv on in another room... ;-;
DarkSeekerX94446 14
Taking "forever alone" to a whole new level.
kareltje 17
WTF? Don't be so selfish! Think about the environment, dude! ;) I'll get me coat...
Pentium_4 27
don't feel bad. loneliness is like a drug, you just can't think straight
McDonaldsworker 4
Hell yeah that's why I like drugs. I take 'em so I can only think crooked, lol
ak4608 8
Get a puppy
Snafuusmc 12
Hey at least your not waking up in a ditch.
22jrdn55 15
meanwhile in africa...
Pentium_4 27
whoa that was an old comment meant for a different FML lol
Pentium_4 27
what did you did, throw it up into the ceiling fan?
laurbear12 3
What??
Pentium_4 27
wrong FML. Fail on my part. if it makes you feel better, i'm on FML all the time cause i'm lonely :P
bamagrl410 31
....... Awkward
Pentium_4 27
yep, an honest mistake is the end of the world...
Ozone1232 5
Way to waste resources.
cBlackout 13
Great, now you're lonely and wasteful.
AJRENO 0
*FOREVER ALONE*
clanon 4
All by myseeeelllfff, don't wanna be all by myseeeelllfff anymoooorreee.
Glockinator 2
I went to the bedroom..... All by myself. I didn't think anyone remembered that song but me because of I reference people look at me like I'm nuts
GoWithTheFro 10
Forever alone...