Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me because she found a lot of red lipstick on my neck. The red lipstick was from her lipstick because she came over in the middle of the night when she was really drunk, then left. She refuses to listen to me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because she said I was more of a woman than she was. I yelled out, "I HATE YOU!" and started to cry. She then took a tampon out of her purse, handed it to me, laughed, and walked away. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because she found a bra in my cupboard. It was hers. FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me. It was our anniversary just 3 nights ago, and she said she was sorry for leading me on. She still hasn’t told me why. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML
Today my girlfriend of three years broke up with me. Why? She wasn’t sure about the relationship anymore. She seemed pretty sure though, seeing she was on Tinder less than two hours after, thanks to the three different friends who all called me about it. FML
Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML
Today, my girlfriend of three years broke up with me, saying I don’t make her happy, I don’t make her laugh, that she feels she is settling for me, and that she's not being pleased sexually. Even though she has always said I did all of that, and that we could work through anything. I was going to propose. FML
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Top comments
napero 0
Women...
perstephane 4
Amen - go get one who isn't crazy. Or, at least one who's less crazy.
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Comments (102)
allmidnighteyes 11
So.... she came over in the middle of the night, left, and yet the lipstick was still there when she saw you x amount of hours later?
your_face 15
Just what I was thinking - why wouldn't you wash your neck? Did you think she would find it cute that you left her lipstick there?
claritin 0
That's what I was thinking, too, but, to be fair, some lipstick leaves stains, especially if it's red and you don't have the proper stuff to get it off.
CallMeHush 1
Dump the lush!
MYLIFEFFINGSUCK 0
Yeah, FYL
ragsy 7
If she is having alcoholic blackouts, good riddance. Who knows who else she is crawling into bed with in the middle of the night.
BrotherTheo 31
She's overreacting. Give her some time to calm down, then talk w/her, prove your innocence,etc. If she won't listen, I'm afraid you'll have to move on :(.
Skull_300 0
Wipe off some of that Lipstick with your underwear when she gets done blowing you! **** that Bitch!!!
Tarnation 0
Take a shower....
TheLetterZero 7
YDI for dating someone who drinks.
your_face 15
You're never going to get a date with that attitude. (And before you go all "Dude, not everyone drinks, ok?" on me, I know. Neither my boyfriend nor I drink, and obviously we both have dates. But I think we happen to be two lucky, rare people, and that anyone who refuses to date a drinker is going to have a hard time finding someone to date in this day and age.)
Rejectofsociety9 0
Not everyone that drinks, does so until they get into that state. Get your facts straight and grow the hell up.
TheTruth1428 0
FYL for what happened but YDI too. Ever think to wash off your neck? In addition to that, you let her leave drunk. If you were a responsible boyfriend, you would have made her stay the night.
kimilei 0
I gotta say I agree with this.
kalynnepointer 7
Agreed
cthulhu1138 1
FYL for your girlfriend being an idiot, but YDI for not showering.