Zibby
🌶️ Spicy
Life hacks
Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Toothy
United States
Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML
sexyfail
Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I learned that removing your boyfriends boxers with your teeth is waaaay less sexy when you accidentally bite a chunk of his pubes and yank them out in the process. FML
Anonymous
London, United Kingdom 🌶️ Spicy
Nice outing
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
unendowed
Katy, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Time consumed
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to go down on me with chewing gum in her mouth. I spent the next hour and a half getting Orbit out of my pubes. FML
Surprisebuttsecks?
Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend shoved a Q-tip up my ass while I was brushing my teeth. FML
yummy
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Terminology
Today, I learned that "eating someone out" didn't actually involve food. FML
Drewzter
United States 🌶️ Spicy
User manual
Today, I found out that pinching the tip of the condom before you roll it down to the base is NOT a suggestion. FML
PerfectBoyfriend
Reet, Belgium 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend got pissed because she thought she heard me masturbating in the bathroom. I was brushing my teeth. FML
Anonymous
Spokane, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Hummmmm
Today, I went down on my boyfriend, and tried out a new trick I learned. I read in a magazine that if you hum while giving oral, it's supposed to feel good. My boyfriend started laughing and told me to stop after 30 seconds because I reminded him of his singing toothbrush. FML
ouchhhh
🌶️ Spicy
Saucy
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try something new in bed. He blindfolded me and I felt something cold on my lady parts. Five seconds later it started burning so I looked. He decided to use toothpaste because he couldn't find chocolate sauce to lick off. It hurts to pee. FML
Top comments
robc32ca 4
washing is a better option
Jimboom 12
Ha ha. I bet you think the idea of spicing up your sex life constitutes putting curry power on your penis.
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Comments (271)
Hmoyler151 4
lol tard
tystef13 0
haha I brushed my teeth and gave my boyfriend a bj
missy1212 0
Well....did you at least score some Pity Points? It was a considerate thought of you, so I hope she appreciated it after she was done laughing her ass off. :P
dnljcbsn 0
yeah!!!!!! acid burn wow u must be retarded while ur at it give flosing string a try DUMBASS
thelawmak3r 0
put mouthwash on it next time itll taste better
pppico 0
are u ******* retarded
CaptainPickles72 18
At least your junk is plaque free :)
Frostillicus123 10
If you need to flavor it try cleaning it. If she still doesn't like it she doesn't love you. If you want to appease her user baby's fruit flavored tooth paste.
Cosmic_Horror 1
Like with Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone, except old enough to know better.
elizabeth705 0
why would you even think thatvwoild taste good????