Today, I woke up for the third time in a row from a wet dream about my ex-girlfriend. I'm currently on my honeymoon. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up from my honeymoon to discover the love of my life is a bed wetter. FML
Today, I had the most action in months when I woke up to a wet dream. I'm married, I guess that tells you all about my sex life. FML
Today, I woke up to find out I'd had a wet dream last night. About someone other than my girlfriend. I don't remember anything about the dream, but my girlfriend remembers everything because apparently I talked throughout my dream, and she was right next to me listening. FML
Today, my alarm rang just as I was about to have a wet dream with my husband. This is the closest I got to having sex in weeks. FML
Today, I took a nap, and I had a dream that my ex-girlfriend got back together with me. I woke up in a great mood. When I went back to bed, I dreamed that she broke up with me, again. FML
Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. When I woke up, I was touching myself. Unfortunately, I also woke up to find that I had fallen asleep on the couch after eating too much at a family reunion. When I looked around the room, over 10 relatives were giving me nasty looks. FML
Today, I had a sexual dream about my ex, and I woke up after saying his name. My boyfriend was awake, and heard all the dirty talk and me moaning my ex-boyfriend's name. FML
Today, while I was sleeping I heard my girlfriend moaning. She was seemed to be having a wet dream. She moaned more in her dream than when having sex with me. FML
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Top comments
Sushimomo 0
"Darling, I swear it was about you!"
DocBastard 40
So your ex is hotter than your wife. So what? Enjoy your dreams, and then you can wake up and enjoy your wife. You win twice!
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Comments (207)
cuddlebunny3548 11
Why are you having wet dreams on your honeymoon? Isnt that from not having sex or jacking off in a while?
titzenpitzer 9
If you think about it, it's not something to be ashamed about. Confused, ok, but to think you've done something horrible? You're still a human with feelings and needs, and constitutionalized agreements won't change that. You can go completely free in your dreams, it'd be scary if that would stop from the moment you commit in a commitment that's made up by man (and its religion)
RadioDeeJayy_ 6
Hope that you're only attracted to your ex's body. Because if I was your wife, I'd be pretty bummed.
jessimica642 8
Yikes I'm sure that conflicts with your religion
jaff23 11
You're a bitch man. Did you say her name during the vows too?
natepooch 4
this girl always gets thumbed down! but **** it, Jersey FTW!!
xStaciexLynnx 15
He was cheering for jersey and you just cursed him out...
simonsaysYDI 8
154 - it's a jersey thing
perdix 31
#131, could one of your husbands also be a polygynist? Your family tree would be a Venn diagram :D
pyroknight_fml 5
Dude! You don't MARRY the rebound chick!