Today, while I was sleeping I heard my girlfriend moaning. She was seemed to be having a wet dream. She moaned more in her dream than when having sex with me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to find out I'd had a wet dream last night. About someone other than my girlfriend. I don't remember anything about the dream, but my girlfriend remembers everything because apparently I talked throughout my dream, and she was right next to me listening. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
Today, I was having a fantastic sex dream. So good, in fact, that I woke myself up breathing heavily and humping my pillow. I was at my friend's house and she saw everything. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML
Today, when my girlfriend woke me up, she said, "I just had the sexiest dream." Thinking she was feeling frisky, I started to try to fool around with her. She pulled away and said, "Well it wasn't about YOU." FML
Today, I woke up from a wet dream. My girlfriend quickly figured it out and bitched me out for having one when she was "right there" for me to ask for sex. Logic failure aside, the last time I flirted with her, she called me a sex-obsessed pig and didn't talk to me for three days. FML
Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke up in the middle of the night, crying. When I asked her why, she said that she had a dream where we were getting married. FML
Today, while napping on the couch, I had a very vivid dream about a girl I like. I woke up to my mother and father choking back laughter and recording me on their phones. I don't know what's worse: waking up with a boner in front of my parents or finding out I was also talking dirty in my sleep. FML
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Top comments
rattusrattus 19
It's quite simple. In dreams, you can have wild orgies with eight sets of identical twins. You can't do that IRL.
Ninjafriends 1
You're assuming it was a sexual dream. It could just as easily have been a nightmare.... about having sex with you.
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Comments (101)
rattusrattus 19
It's quite simple. In dreams, you can have wild orgies with eight sets of identical twins. You can't do that IRL.
ijustcamementedo 0
I do that in real life. it is hard to find twin sheep though.
DarkHelmet 10
Twins Bassel....Twins!!
rattusrattus 19
2 - Is your surname Melchett, by any chance?
goldhighways 0
hahaha love your picture 31.
Riku714 25
In your dreams!
MdMan2 23
Challenge accepted.
machiko_fml 0
You suck then, OP.
iloveloosy12 0
yeah three letters OP YDI
FrenchToast94 0
what does YDI mean.
cradle6 13
Yokels did ibuprofen
OhShuttup 0
yummy dead insects
islandz 0
you dumb idiot
Skodos_fml 0
You did it
Lucidium 0
You Deserve It.
Doortje 30
That's a hint, buddy. Start working on your performance.
iSitt 0
softly whisper your name I'm her ear over and over and hope it isn't a nightmare
satomi_ishida 0
No no, OP should just give her surprise sex. Just mount her, give it to her good and say "Oh yeah moan for me!"
scotty24 0
rape is just surprise sex
twat_luva 0
its not rape if you say surprise everyone knows that
TalkSick 2
It probably wasnt you in the dream.
Drummer_duck 0
it was me :p
iamchuck 0
Somehow, I doubt that ^^
Phustercluck 11
it was Brian Peppers!!!
xnox 6
34 - you are hot, but not gay =`(
Phustercluck 11
Ty, and sorry broseph :
IGuessIDeservedI 0
It was me! xD
xavier1623 4
Hey heres an awesome idea. Shes wet, you need sex. 2+2=4.
tallerguy87 0
well she was probably dreaming about someone else then
suckmyassitsmell 0
Don't worry, she was probably just pleasing herself because you aren't man enough to!
perdix 31
Obviously, she was dreaming about having sex with a real man with an ordinary-sized dick, a few sex skills and the ability to last for more than 30 seconds. Watch some **** and consider that as training.
double_a_bro 0
lol
Lia_Mackenzie 4
Perdix, **** is awful training for sex. Most girls don't want to be treated like blow-up dolls or have to get awkward liquids out of their hair, or wherever those "money shots" are aimed. :P
fthku 13
YDI for not pleasing your girl enough. So not everyone's a natural sex god. Once in you're in a relationship, however, you don't need to be. All you need is some time to realise what she likes, how she likes it and when. Sharing and talking about it is probably a good idea. Or she could just be a moany girl. My girlfriend moans at everything (A sexy sexual moan), regardless of sexual pleasure. I actually ask her to shut up sometimes!
pavloviandoggy 4
This! I moan in my sleep, when I stretch, etc. It sounds like I'm having an ******. But whenever I mess around, I don't moan, I giggle, I say stuff. Honestly, if she's making **** moans during sex, she's faking.
rusrsbrah 0
that's actually false. my chick moans and gasps when she's feeling good. it's different for everyone. like me, I don't moan or make faces, or grunt. I breath a little heavier. that's about it. I kinda trained myself to be quiet when I get off so my sister doesn't hear. haha.
decidedlyvague 11
When I first read that, I thought you said I trained myself to be a little quieter when I get off my sister o.o
voodoopandaa 0
Maybe she's embarrassed to moan in front of you?
muffinlizzie 7
I can agree with that. I know a few people who find it embarrassing to moan/scream/etc during sex, so they don't.
Ninjafriends 1
You're assuming it was a sexual dream. It could just as easily have been a nightmare.... about having sex with you.
enoughgrace 4
boom, headshot
devilcb 5
using your 'weapon' against you