Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML
Today, after telling my boyfriend I never achieved an orgasm with any of my past partners, and therefore telling him what I need to get there, he won't even touch me, let alone do anything "down there" because he has never done it on any of his past girlfriends, and thinks it's gross. I make sure to always be fresh and clean. FML
Today, I realized I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world. Too bad he has never once made me orgasm in the two and a half years we've been together. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me if I have ever or would ever fake an orgasm. I assured him that I wouldn't, when he has actually never given me one. I didn't have the heart to tell him. FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML
Today, being on my boyfriend's street bike for ten minutes gave me an orgasm. My boyfriend of three years, who constantly tries so hard to get me to, has never given me an orgasm. FML
Today, according to my boyfriend, getting me to orgasm takes so long that about 90% of his mental energy is directed at him trying not to orgasm first, so he never really enjoys himself. When he fails to get me to orgasm, I apparently use the forbidden sex phrase “It's fine” which makes him feel worse. FML
Today, while playing a game, my girlfriend told a bunch of our friends that she's never had an orgasm. News to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend has so many hang ups about being good at sex that when we actually had sex for the first time this morning, he got upset that I was touching my clit while he was inside me. Apparently it was a sign I think he’s bad at it, and had to do it myself. Neither of us orgasmed today. FML
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Top comments
mpj13 8
Tell him to stop asking questions then
alexup24 13
curiosity killed the cat, and the ******...
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Comments (162)
jayejayejaye122 3
Tell him to raise his hand whenever he has another question
BlvckScvle 2
Let him ask while still going down, best of both worlds.
Old_Man_Jenkins 0
Tape his mouth
GMS1 7
Good one.
ycrem0n 21
but then going down on her would be pointless
maxwells_hammer 5
He could just rub it with his nose I guess.
berichsoon 11
That won't do it
poopshreds 10
then he can just rub tape around right? amidoingitright?
BigCheezy73 2
How would that help?
strawberrywine22 30
Be honest with him. Simply state that you would have a much better (and quicker) ****** if he stopped asking. Or you could start doing the same thing to him!
HonestTruth 5
At least he is close, tell him to stop asking questions.
pjmommy 9
just tell him the dos and donts and you'll be coming in no time
BrysGirl27 14
He was just checking:) be a good sport about it
phatdaddy62 23
Tell him to shut up and you'll moan to let him know you're there!
brendazelada 10
Hold his head down lmao should work ;)
spazticechidna 2
Then talk to him, I hate when girls complain about how bad their boyfriends/husband are in bed yet they don't even make an effort to show them how to make you happy. -.-
Stardew 19
My boyfriend was like that when we first got together. After shushing him a few times he finally quit. Maybe try that. When he asks a question, say "Sh!" and push his head back down. If he's smart, he'll figure it out.
Laurenlou 24
Or she could communicate with her partner and just tell him he doesn't need to ask, because she is almost there? Games like that aren't always a good thing, considering that OP is complaining about it.