Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML
Today, after telling my boyfriend I never achieved an orgasm with any of my past partners, and therefore telling him what I need to get there, he won't even touch me, let alone do anything "down there" because he has never done it on any of his past girlfriends, and thinks it's gross. I make sure to always be fresh and clean. FML
Today, I realized I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world. Too bad he has never once made me orgasm in the two and a half years we've been together. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me if I have ever or would ever fake an orgasm. I assured him that I wouldn't, when he has actually never given me one. I didn't have the heart to tell him. FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML
Today, being on my boyfriend's street bike for ten minutes gave me an orgasm. My boyfriend of three years, who constantly tries so hard to get me to, has never given me an orgasm. FML
Today, according to my boyfriend, getting me to orgasm takes so long that about 90% of his mental energy is directed at him trying not to orgasm first, so he never really enjoys himself. When he fails to get me to orgasm, I apparently use the forbidden sex phrase “It's fine” which makes him feel worse. FML
Today, while playing a game, my girlfriend told a bunch of our friends that she's never had an orgasm. News to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend has so many hang ups about being good at sex that when we actually had sex for the first time this morning, he got upset that I was touching my clit while he was inside me. Apparently it was a sign I think he’s bad at it, and had to do it myself. Neither of us orgasmed today. FML
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Top comments
mpj13 8
Tell him to stop asking questions then
alexup24 13
curiosity killed the cat, and the ******...
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Comments (162)
billybob1890 10
Make use of them thighs and get him a snorkel!
benhemon 4
100+ comments and no one suggested what seems obvious: COMMUNICATE. Make noise, tell him you're enjoying yourself, tell him you're getting close. He cannot read your mind. Even if he knows what he's doing, it is very frustrating to be going down on a woman who is mostly silent, having no idea whether your effort has any effect or whether she'll climax eventually (particularly if she requires 5+ minutes of oral to climax). Just telling him that it feels good, that you are close, that you aren't close yet but you're on your way, or that he needs to do X instead of Y will mean you both enjoy yourselves more, and he won't need to ask questions.
olpally 33
Cool story, bro...
iBiteRoses 22
Haha, sounds kinda like my ex, except he didn't know what the f he was doing. And every five minutes it was like "Does that feel good baby?" "**** NO YOU SUCK AT THIS" "Oh I don't really care"
benhemon 4
[Deleted for double post.]
lissann 0
Next time just grab his head and force it down.
eyecon502 13
Next time just sit on his face and wiggle until you get off.
countryswinger 0
Y not tell him while he's down on u that u enjoy it and that ur about to ****** then he wouldn't have to ask
5t3ff1k4h 47
Not everyone likes to be that vocal during sex or oral sex. For some, it kills the mood the same as if he was still asking questions.
GoldenGrizzly 7
Well, it sounds like she hasn't told him what she likes from her moods. In reality you should be willing to let your partner know what you like. You have to be "vocal" at some point. Not forever, but at least until he gets what to do in bed.
hateevryone 15
I hate when guys do that. Like quit talking.
merrilln 7
Lock your legs around his head.
kalbrek009 20
Just tell him that "yes" it always feels good & that you'll let him up after you ******, then keep your hand firmly on his head & press upward into his face while pressing down with your hand (don't suffocate him though) then press your thighs against the sides of his face as you ******. It's quiet & he'll get his answer without having to continue to ask.