Today, I was in school when I spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her, I broke her nose. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, My girlfriend came from behind me and put her hand in my back pockets. I though it was someone trying to take my wallet, I elbowed her in the nose and broke it. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, I tried to impress a girl by draping my arm over the back of her chair. I ended up elbowing her in the nose. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML
Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML
Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML
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Top comments
HollyDolly660 8
HAHA. Fail. At least you were TRYING to do something sweet... I bet she would rather you didn't now.. You better do something extra romantic to make up for that, that doesn't involve hurting her.....
maskedman 9
that's sounds more like a wrestling move than a romantic move.
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Comments (137)
TurtleHabitat 0
Way to go. Aslan is proud
R3kli3 10
so did she break up with you?
trebla3193 0
wow op is from new jersey and no jersey shore jokes yet...
Person1233 13
The show is a joke. The Jersey Shore is awesome, however, especially Cape May :D
Starfire22 5
...because anyone with a brain knows that the show "Jersey Shore" is about shoobies from NEW YORK vacationing in New Jersey not about the people who live at the shore...
maskedman 9
that's sounds more like a wrestling move than a romantic move.
Freeze_fml 17
You're doing it wrong.
millerjake33 0
^ lol
Enslaved 38
It could have been romantic.
TurtleHabitat 0
Way to go, Aslan is proud.
swagga0n1oo 0
Yeah...Chris Brown also said he was just trying to kiss Rihanna...and look how that turned out =X
volleyballx3 2
HAA, dickkk!
xallbe 0
two words. peppermint swirl. you know what to do. };3
sykes831 0
well at least you were trying to be sweet. :)