Today, it's my birthday and my mom took me and some friends to an amusement park. Looking for a tampon, I found a phone in my mom's purse that I didn't recognize. Turns out my mom is cheating on my dad. Happy birthday to me, I guess. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went into my Moms room to look for a t-shirt. I went into her drawer and behind all of her clothes was a cell phone. Not only did I not find the t-shirt, I also found out my Mom is cheating on my Dad with someone from work and now I have to pretend like I don't know. I work there too. FML
Today, it's my birthday. After a day out partying, I came home to find all my stuff smashed in the yard, even my 42" plasma TV. After asking my girlfriend what her problem was, she said a "slut" left a message on the machine stating how fun last night was. It turned out to be my mom. FML
Today, my parents took me out to dinner. I thought they were taking me because it's my birthday. Turns out they are getting divorced. They forgot it was my birthday. FML
Today, I missed a call from my mom. It's my birthday, and glad she remembered, I called back to thank her. She was surprised when I brought up going out for dinner, and asked me what the occasion was. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My dad was supposed to take me to get a tattoo, but instead he went to the bar, got drunk, and told me how I was the biggest mistake he and my mom have ever made. FML
Today, my mom was screaming and throwing things at me and I didn’t know why. Then I checked the date. Her birthday was yesterday. FML
Today, it's my mom's birthday. I woke up at midnight to be the first to tell her happy birthday. When I awoke in the morning, I decided to bake her a cake. Little did I know my whole family was going out to lunch to celebrate. I wasn't invited. FML
Today, I came home a day after my birthday, and was greeted by my mother who told me, "Oh, I have birthday present for you." She explained that she and my father went on a hike, and handed me my present. I got a fucking stick for my birthday. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My dad came to pick me up, but after I had put my backpack in the back seat and closed the car door, he drove off without me. It started to rain, and I was without my phone or wallet. FML
Today, my parents and I went to the movies for my mom's birthday. After the movie, my mom and dad got into a fight, and left me at the movies. My cell phone was dead, and my house was about 12 miles away. They finally came and picked me up, hours later. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
My birthday wish for you is that you have as much fun on your rides as your mom does on hers.
bullsonyourface 20
maybe she's just a drug dealer
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (6)
ojosRojos 28
How did you come to that conclusion? If it’s true, I’m really sorry.
RichardPencil 32
She apparently asked her mom why she has a spare phone and the truth came out.
silvermoon5033 26
or she opened it and saw texts/pictures from another person that were of an intimate nature.
bullsonyourface 20
maybe she's just a drug dealer
RichardPencil 32
My birthday wish for you is that you have as much fun on your rides as your mom does on hers.
Matt Richard Conklin 6
Just because you found a phone u dont recognize dosnt mean shes cheating. Im 99.9% she is but be safe be 100%..