Today, I was in school when I spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her, I broke her nose. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, My girlfriend came from behind me and put her hand in my back pockets. I though it was someone trying to take my wallet, I elbowed her in the nose and broke it. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, I tried to impress a girl by draping my arm over the back of her chair. I ended up elbowing her in the nose. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML
Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML
Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML
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Top comments
HollyDolly660 8
HAHA. Fail. At least you were TRYING to do something sweet... I bet she would rather you didn't now.. You better do something extra romantic to make up for that, that doesn't involve hurting her.....
maskedman 9
that's sounds more like a wrestling move than a romantic move.
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Comments (137)
s_me_ashley 2
aw that;s adorable!!! at least you tried and she probably apreciats that but is upset with her nose=] but dont worry and if she gets upset tell her what u rlly thought including the whole movie thing that;s super cute!!! good luck to both a ya sweetie lol
Beast1226 0
smooth
arejaykillow57 0
well if she understands and isnt mad then you got yourself a winner bro
pinkballerina721 0
haha
DogmaT_fml 4
spozie are you in like 5th grade? or have some very sheltered friends
bliingblurr 0
omg.... one time a guy broke my nose while we were playin flirty one-on-one :( it sucks
DogmaT_fml 4
sean white!
extants 0
why would you do this in school?
indianabummer 0
Practical application of romance moves in movies is a terrible plan, especially since most of the stuff they do is considered stalkerish and creepy in every day life. Next time you watch a movie like Major League (she's engaged to another man, about to be married, he had cheated on her, and even though she said bug off, he knew deep down it meant yes) Hitch (researching women and tricking them into loving you, wtf?) Ever favorite Twilight (Watches her sleep through her window?), and I could go on and on. It's nice in theory, but real life? Grounds for a restraining order
FarSide 23
...And now she looks like all the other girls from New Jersey....