Today, I got all four of my wisdom teeth removed. I went to see my boyfriend for comfort because I was in so much pain. The first thing he asked me when I saw him with huge cheeks? When would be the next time I could give him a blowjob. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had my wisdom teeth removed. The sympathetic words from my boyfriend asked if this meant I could open my mouth a bit wider for him now. FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. My girlfriend had agreed to come over after and make sure I was okay, so I called her, saying I was done. She told me she'd made new plans, and to "just suck on a tampon, you pussy". FML
Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML
Today, I had all four of my wisdom teeth extracted. Under anesthesia I told the dentist my entire love life and drug history in detail. FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth pulled. My usually detached and unromantic boyfriend rushed right over after work with flowers and movies. A little while later, he admitted excitedly that he'd heard the numbing medication also works on gag reflexes and wanted to test the theory. FML
Today, my girlfriend got her wisdom teeth removed. I really want to help her out while she recovers, but her swollen cheeks combined with her natural buck teeth keep making me crack up every time I see her. I can't help it and I'm now in the doghouse. FML
Today, I had my wisdom teeth taken out. I vaguely remember telling the doctor that I'm a virgin. Several times. FML
Today, I went to the dentist to get my wisdom teeth removed. The surgeon took a better X-ray to see what he was dealing with before he got started. When he came back into the room, he started to laugh and told me it was my lucky day because in the X-rays he found 2 big extra wisdom teeth. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me when my face was going to go back to normal after being swollen from having my wisdom teeth taken out last week. My face is back to normal. FML
Today, I had my wisdom teeth pulled. The local anesthesia worked on three of the four teeth. I found out about the last tooth when the dentist was mid-yank. FML
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Top comments
Star18lk 0
What a jerk!!! He might only want you for sex, Look for clues! Hope you feel better!
xundria 5
Hmm... yeah, leave him.
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Comments (246)
pleasenopuffin 0
God, wouldn't knowing the girls on /b/ were this whiny make you NOT want to troll?
aphillips1123 0
someones a hoe
Erindub 0
Oh sweetheart, I feel your pain. I got a tooth pulled last Friday and have been feeling like death ever since. My boyfriend was sweet and caring for the first few days but yesterday when he was over it seemed as though hes ready for this to be over now so I could go down on him : ( this sucks
SAYwhatFML 0
What else did you think he wants you for?
sublime2craig 0
wow I love how the preteen is giving you sex advise!!! hey can't blame the guy you must give good head!!!
Bizzatch 0
so how long is it going to be?
theeBeezWaXx 0
haha aww . wow what a dick. you should have said now
bobbyb57 0
lol if girls think he's a bad guy cuz of that they might be a lil mistaken cuz there is no such thing as a guy who doesn't think about sex a portion of the time I mean really now he was probably just joking and girls are just given these fake representations of perfect guys like edward Cullen lol vampires aren't real nor is there a perfect guy
musicmanman 0
so, how long will it be??
babybubz 0
ugh.. men.