Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was eager to learn how to use chopsticks, as I was in a nice Chinese restaurant and had ordered noodles. As I was visibly struggling to eat, the server brought me a fork. When I reached for it, I flicked a noodle into a lady's soup at the next table. FML
Today, I ordered takeout. When I looked in the bag, I saw they'd included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, then estimated that there must be at least four people eating such a large meal. I was eating alone. FML
Today, I was washing dishes after eating Christmas leftovers. I pulled a knife out of the drying rack and put it away to avoid cutting myself on it, yet I still managed to scrape my thumb on an errant fork in the sink. FML
Today, during my second day on the job, I ate pasta with a pen in the backroom. My old job provided plasticware, and it never occurred to me to pack a fork. FML
Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML
Today, at work, I got to wait on one of those tables where everyone had very complex orders, and some of them sent their food back. When the time finally came for me to bring them their check and receive my well-earned tip, I returned only to discover that they'd dined and dashed. FML
Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML
Today, my kids and I went to have dinner with a coworker. After everyone ate, the kids went to play while I helped clear the dishes. To my horror, instead of individually wrapping the kids leftovers, she scraped all the uneaten food back into the main pots. I wanted to puke on the spot. FML
Today, I was on a double date at a restaurant with two friends of mine and a guy I really liked. Things started getting really quiet so I decided to start talking to make things a little bit less awkward even though I was eating. I ended up spitting a piece of chicken across the table. FML
Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML
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Top comments
littleflowertje 13
Why??
kirbo2 21
Looks like somebody forked up
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Comments (49)
tjpr314 8
Why would you have been embarrassed to ask for another fork? So you made a mistake, you're a human being, things happen. The hands move quicker than the eyes sometimes. It's okay. If that small of a thing happened I would hate to think of how you would handle something big or serious.
tjpr314 8
I use to be shy like that but when you are not like that anymore you will begin to feel better and stronger and won't think anything about simple mistakes like that. You will speak up right away like you are in control of the situation and feel confident about it.
twankin 4
Reduce,reuse,recycle
CastaP 12
As a man with anxiety himself, I have to say that this doesn't make sense. If it is to avoid embarrasment, then you're doing the exact opposite of what you could have done instead. "Excuse me, I've misplaced my fork somehow, can I bother you for a replacement? Thank you!" That'd be it, since it is part of their job to make sure dinners have what they need while there, but you gotta speak up for them to do so.
snickerpuss 9
Jesus, you're not a child, ask for a godamn fork
worldclassrager 41
You'll fit in just fine in Australia...
kevinsagirl2323 8
seriously? that's just so stupid.
millsjoshua949 12
Wow. Why didn't you just ask for a fork? I really dont get this. You could have easily asked for a fork but chose not to. ydi
Wadlaen 24
I would have loved to witness that at a restaurant!