Today, my boyfriend got a new tattoo. It was a big tattoo of Pikachu on his hip. I told him now I'd feel like I was having sex with an 8-year-old boy. His defense? "No, no, think of it as having sex with Pikachu!" He still refuses to understand why that's weird. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got my boyfriend naked for the first time. He had "Baby Fucker" tattooed over his groin. He had some weird explanation for it, but I couldn't stop thinking about him fucking a baby, and it turned me off massively. I don't think I can keep dating him. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML
Today, I showed my boyfriend the new tattoo of a butterfly that I'd gotten on my lower back. He said, "It looks like it's flying when your rolls jiggle." FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he'd think of me getting his initials tattooed over my heart. "That's awesome, babe," he answered enthusiastically. "But could you get them on your ass instead?" FML
Today, my girlfriend got a tattoo of a Rainbow Dash over her pubic mound. Now whenever I go down on her, I'll be eye-to-eye with an adorable pony that shits rainbows. FML
Today, my husband bought a Pokémon game and started playing it in bed. It's like I'm married to an eight year-old boy. Why can't I have a normal man, who reads books or even plays normal games for an adult? I can barely look at him without feeling ashamed for settling with such an overgrown child. FML
Today, unbeknownst to me, my boyfriend got a tattoo of the Joker on his neck. The worst part? It's Jared Leto's godawful Joker. FML
Today, my girlfriend got a sexy new tattoo as a surprise for me. It’s on her boob in Japanese, next to a pair of sexy lips, and she claims it says "Oral Queen." I'm fluent in Japanese so I wish she'd asked for my help first, because it actually translates to "Mouth Ruler" which is not sexy at all. FML
Today, my girlfriend got a new tattoo - the Blink-182 logo on her stomach. I wouldn't mind it, except she got pregnant a month ago and I'm pretty sure that it can't good for the baby. FML
Today, my fiancé freaked when he noticed the tattoo on my wrist, and demanded to know when I got it. It was two years before we even started dating. FML
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Top comments
Valkyrie2012 4
I can just imagine the ****** sound
MelTheGreat 23
PIKA!......nasty.
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Comments (181)
KrazyKatz3 26
Why didn't he consult you before getting the tattoo? Maybe you could have decided on a place you wouldn't see it or something.