Today, my boss sent out an email with the subject line "Urgent". He accidentally left the body of the email blank. I replied to all staff "You're firing blanks Peter". I later heard that his wife once got drunk and told everyone that they couldn't have kids because he has a low sperm count. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sent an email to my boss saying I'd fixed a glitch in our mail servers. He called me later, angrily shouting that I'd done a piss-poor job of fixing it, because my email had spammed his inbox with several hundred duplicate messages. FML
Today, my boss mistakenly drunk-texted me and was talking shit about me. FML
Today, my boss asked me to send an email on his behalf with an important report attached. I've already received 3 responses from directors commenting on poor spelling and factual errors. I get paid 1/4 the salary of my boss and he can't even write properly. FML
Today, my coworker sent an email to the whole company asking us to fill in a survey. I've been secretly seeing her for two months, so I responded with "sure thing baby, and by the way I ran out of condoms, can you bring more for tonight?" I accidentally hit reply all. FML
Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML
Today, I accidentally emailed the entire company everyone's salary, sales history, and the names of four people I intended to fire. FML
Today, I sent an email to my boss about a sensitive project. After hitting send and getting a response, I remembered I'd set my automatic reply to say, "I'm currently out of the office, enjoying a much-needed break from all the idiots I work with." My boss was not amused when he replied and got the automatic email in return. FML
Today, my boss tried to fire me for not emailing him a screenshot to prove my email wasn't working. FML
Today, I sent a reply-all email to my entire company that said "Go tit" instead of "Got it". FML
Today, I got a heads-up that my boss suffered a death in the family, but was coming into work anyway. I thought he'd be depressed, but it seems he deals with grief with anger instead. I found that out when he yelled at me, threatening to rip my spine out my ass over a typo I made in a report. FML
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Top comments
sydney9_fml 0
Bahahaha! I had to read that twice before I got it though... heehee
AdamGD 0
Wow... Ironic. Pretty hilarious though
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Comments (98)
LMAO_over_here 0
haha - too funny ;)
khatuba 0
i don't get this
auroraaustralis 0
I will never understand why people say/type inappropriate things to their bosses, realize it was heard/could be interpreted in another way/etc. and then post it to FML like we're supposed to feel sorry for them. You don't say inappropriate things to your boss, period. Regardless of whether you think it's harmless or can't be overheard or anything else of that nature. Not if you're planning on staying employed. It's stupid and unprofessional. YDI.
plethora 3
It wouldn't be considered inappropriate without the context, and the OP didn't know. But I still went with YDI for using the reply all option.
auroraaustralis 0
It is inappropriate since there's a sexual connotation to the term 'firing blanks.'
ihatestupidppl 0
Um, its not automatically considered a sexual reference. There are such things as blank cartridges (or, blanks). They're used in firearms, but contain no bullets. Since they would be shot out of a gun of some sort, they'd be fired. Firing blanks.
lifeaveragekinda 0
To be honest, I didn't realize that firing blanks could be referred to sperm until it was put into that context. I always that it just meant blank cartridges.
Raddaya 3
"The body was blank, Peter" can also be a double entendre. ANYTHING can be a double entendre.
xNephilim 19
You know, some people have a good friendly relationship with their boss. My mom has worked at the same places for twenty something years and her bosses have been there for quite a while too, if not the same amount of time. They all get along extremely well and joke around all the time. This often includes a good bit of the staff. It all depends on how you get along with your boss.
pepperjack 0
I dont get it
Anonanimal 0
you fail at life
aintnobody 0
Maybe some people are confused because you left out a comma -- it should read, "You're firing blanks, Peter." It took me several reads to know you weren't referring to firing in the laying off sense.
av232 0
rofl. You didn't know, FYL. it's funny how many FMLs there are where people hear things after the fact :)
stupiidx3 0
lols its not **** his life. more like **** the boss 's life now the whole company nows !
ihatestupidppl 0
I think OP implied everyone knew already ("his wife once got drunk and told everyone that they couldn't have kids because he has a low sperm count"). But now OP just kinda rubbed it in...so yeah F his boss's life for being embarrassed...again =
crumblemumble 0
What a horrible coincidence. Lol
alwaysalady 0
nice. I love things like that
freddie_fml 0
The funniest part of this is the guy's name is Peter. And yeah, YDI for the inappropriate phraseology.