Today, I told my parents that I'm a smoker. My mother started crying, and said she worried I was gay, but this is almost as bad. That lead on to part two of my confession. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came out to my mom. I had an epic speech planned, and when I tried to tell her, it all fell apart and I started crying and just said, "I'm gay." After a few seconds silence, my mom sighs and says, "Duh." FML
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML
Today, I regretfully confessed to my parents I have trichotillomania. There was a torturous pause, followed by the question, "Are you gay?" FML
Today, after weeks of thinking and playing every outcome possible in my head, I told my parents I'm gay. My dad nodded and didn't even look up from his book; my mom told me to go to the doctor if it starts to itch. FML
Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because she "wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML
Today, I told my friends I had been hiding something that I wanted to come clean on. My one friend responds by saying, "FINALLY you come out of the closet. It's about time." I'm not gay. I was just going to tell them my parents were getting a divorce. FML
Today, I learned that despite having told them two years ago, my parents still aren't accepting of me being gay. I found this out when my mom called and asked if I was "cured" yet. FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to tell my mom that I'm gay. She sympathetically patted my back and told me I don't need to make up excuses for me being so unattractive to women. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
azouwa 26
I suggest you give her a week before you hit her with part 2.
EggyDogger 13
Give it a month, or 5
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (20)
azouwa 26
I suggest you give her a week before you hit her with part 2.
EggyDogger 13
Give it a month, or 5
pjsr 33
Compromise, promise her you won’t smoke at your big fat gay wedding.
RichardPencil 32
It should be ok, just as long as you're not a Republican.
yeezuschrist420 11
Truth
coolmike699 26
If you're gonna tell it, then you gotta tell it all.
dexter420 21
That would have worked better in reverse
chosha_fml 27
Your mum sounds Mormon. :) But seriously OP, who smokes in 2018? Quit that shit now!
wanted_2_want 40
Just tell your mom that you enjoy ‘big cigars’. If you know what I mean.
Sinshine 28
I can understand not being happy about your cold smoking but crying because of that? Really? Hope you got the other thing through to her, though.
darkchaosforces 12
You should make a trailer out of that! "When a man expresses that he smokes and is gay to his beloved parents, mom just can't take the heat. Find out what happens next on 'My Hidden Confessions, Part Two!'"