Today, I was sifting through my parents old home movies. I put in one and was horrified to see my parents having sex. I immediately ejected the tape and looked at the label. It said "Bermuda, 1989." They've told me I was conceived in Bermuda around that time. I've seen my own conception. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that I was conceived during a conjugal visit. FML
Today, due to my boyfriend teasing me about me possibly having been conceived on a beach because I was born in Hawaii, I finally asked my mom if I really was. She said no, but then told me in detail how much sex on a beach hurts when you get sand up your ass. FML
Today, my siblings and I were going through our old home movies after our mom recently passed away. We accidentally found a VHS sex tape of our mom and dad in their 20's. We are now collectively psychologically scarred, and can never unsee what we have seen. FML
Today, my mom got out a camcorder she's had a while, saying that there were tapes of me from when I was a child. The first tape I put in was a porno starring her and her ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I showed my girlfriend some old home videos of me as a kid. My dad must have taped over one though, because halfway through it cut to extremely graphic footage of his colonoscopy. FML
Today, I went to my parents house to secretly collect all of their home videos and convert them to DVDs as a Christmas gift. Among them I found a sex tape my parents had made. FML
Today, my parents told me I was conceived at Disney World. Monday, I take a class trip to Disney World. My friends will be having fun and all I'll be able to think about is my parents having sex. FML
Today, my parents told me that they had planned two kids (my older siblings) and I was born because my father "thought" that he was wearing a condom. FML
Today, my girlfriend's family came over and I thought it would be fun to watch old family videos of when I was a kid. A few minutes into my fifth birthday party, I excused myself and went to grab some snacks for everyone. I returned to realize I had recorded porn over my family videos. FML
Today, I found out I was born as a result of someone switching my mom's birth control pills with Tic Tacs. FML
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Top comments
Kamicase 0
Actually it's kind of cool. Not many people can say, that they've seen their own creation. : )
dvb77 0
Oh god, that's horrific. Ughhhh, I'd want to throw up
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Comments (198)
im_prison_mike 0
Well, that sucks. However, it's better than having your mother tell you she's not exactly sure who your father is, and then later telling you that you are the worst mistake she ever made... Gotta look at the positives here
kamikaze_fml 0
#13 is retarded
PTERONOPHOBIA 0
Oh, call the wahhhmbulance. Poor little baby.
lifepwns 0
LOL #17
Jasper_fml 0
#7. lol. true, true.
airandfingers 0
ew, they told you how/where you were conceived?
alwaysalady 0
My parents swear up and down that I'm a changeling, and therefore was never conceived.
vitamin_f 0
That's kinda cool actually!
ajudaeu 0
Man, I laughed. I am sorry. I know it must have been shocking to see such a scene, but unfortunatelly I laughed.
Celtic88 0
Look on the bright side, at least you know you weren't adopted.