Anonymous
Hey Scratchy!
Today, I got a mosquito bite under each armpit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Hockessin, United States
Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. FML
awkardtaco
Today, in spite of 2 different types of bug spray, underwear, and jeans, I discovered not one, but two mosquito bites on my vagina. FML
Shitsuo01
Douglasville, United States
Today, I noticed a small bite on my arm. I couldn't figure out what it came from until I saw a small insect crawling out of my bra. FML
fax4voice3
Greenwich, United States
The climate is whack
Today, it was an unusually warm day after many weeks of typical subfreezing temperatures, so my family and I went for a walk in the park. We all came back with mosquito bites. FML
sprainedankle
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
Riyadh, Saudi Arabia
The itch from hell
Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML
julian1
Orlando, United States
Today, I decided to sunbathe in my backyard in an attempt to be healthy. The result? Insect bites over my body. Somehow, despite being fully clothed the entire time, my scrotum also received several bites. FML
swollenego
United States
Overprotective
Today, as I was walking out of a park, I bent to examine a mosquito bite I had. As I looked up, I noticed a nearby couple staring and whispering in abject horror before calling their kids over to get bug-sprayed, pointing me out. Terrified, they immediately complied. It’s not even my worst bite. FML
sleepless
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
LEAVE ME ALONE
Today, it's the third day that I can't sleep. Somewhere in my room, there's a mosquito craving for my blood, and every time I'm about to fall asleep, I can hear it flying around. I'm covered in bites, even in places that barely see the daylight. FML
Takethefoot
Cabot, United States
Gotta catch 'em all
Today, I now have a plantar wart, chigger bites, and a brown recluse spider bite all in the same foot. FML
adamwilcockson
Brisbane, Australia
Today, I found out I'm allergic to bug repellent. So instead of having a couple of itchy bug bites, my skin feels like it's on fire and is violently itchy everywhere the repellent has touched. FML
Top comments
jbuckets_404 39
Guess your next deodorant brand oughta include DEET in its ingredients list.... :D
acmariner99 25
ooh, ooh, ah, ah. Monkey noise or scratch relief, you decide!
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Comments (6)
jbuckets_404 39
Guess your next deodorant brand oughta include DEET in its ingredients list.... :D
acmariner99 25
ooh, ooh, ah, ah. Monkey noise or scratch relief, you decide!
RichardPencil 32
At least it's not on your crotch! Scratching your armpits makes you look like a garden-variety idiot like Mary Catherine Gallagher. If you scratch your crotch, they call you a pervert!
GamerChickxoxo 16
facepalms...Boobs. Those are called your boobs dear
bullshtbrenda 2
at least it's not on ur butt
DrSamba 7
I get bitten a lot when I come back from the gym. Mosquitoes are attracted to CO2 and possibly sweat.