Today, my sister-in-law announced she would like me to be her surrogate, so that her body doesn't look like a stretched wobbly mess after childbirth. Apparently, I'm a perfect candidate, as "we won't see a difference." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today my daughter asked me to do her a huge favor : undergo a liposuction transplantation where my fat would be sucked out then put into her butt and thighs. Apparently, I am the fattest DNA match to her, lessening the risk of her rejecting the transplant. FML
Today, my sister who I'm being a surrogate for told me that she changed her mind and doesn't want kids anymore. It's way too late for me to have an abortion. FML
Today, my sister tried to convince me to go to a plastic surgeon, because "Bitchface Syndrome's no joke." FML
Today, my sister-in-law announced that she’s pregnant. With my kid. And the doctor thinks it might be twins. FML
Today, my sister announced her pregnancy at my husband's funeral. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my little sister as she explained that all these guys like her now that she's so skinny and beautiful. My mom must have overheard me tell my sister that at least I was a cuter child, because my mom laughed and said, "Yeah right, we had to buy you fat kid diapers." FML
Today, I told my daughter that she's going to be a big sister, because there is a baby growing in my tummy. She's been sobbing because I can't convince her that I didn't eat a baby. FML
Today, my little sister asked me what she would look like when she got older. I told her that she would probably look a lot like me. She started to cry. FML
Today, my sister told me she didn’t want me in her wedding pictures because I looked fat in my bridesmaid's dress. FML
Today, I met this girl who's perfect. Turns out, since I'm adopted, she might be my sister. FML
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Top comments
Gradask 10
IF this is the only reason why she wouldn't want to go through pregnancy, she is very shallow and has problem that needs to be dealt with before she get any kids. Being a mother isnt easy nor pretty and you wont have time to keep your self "perfectly beauty" constantly.
AmbrosiaFan 19
"somebody that vain about her looks and her body doesn't deserve to be called a mother, so no I won't be your surrogate".
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Comments (16)
Gradask 10
IF this is the only reason why she wouldn't want to go through pregnancy, she is very shallow and has problem that needs to be dealt with before she get any kids. Being a mother isnt easy nor pretty and you wont have time to keep your self "perfectly beauty" constantly.
AmbrosiaFan 19
"somebody that vain about her looks and her body doesn't deserve to be called a mother, so no I won't be your surrogate".
Zekfen 17
Agree to, go through the process of getting the egg implanted. Go get an abortion and tell her you changed your mind because you didn’t want to bring another bitch like her in the world.
JasonThorn 23
And since it's not actually her baby, she just committed murder in the first. Prison WOULD keep her away from her sister, though.
RichardPencil 32
Sometimes it pays to be a stretched wobbly mess! I doubt your "stretched wobbly mess" dating profile is getting much play amongst normal males.
icalledhisname 12
This is ignorant in every way. I had a baby, gained 50 lbs, lost it in a year. I have the same body I had before. No stretch marks, boobs went back to normal, no flabby skin. You can’t tell I was ever pregnant. If people eat healthy and exercise right, their bodies can go back to normal. Yes, some bodies do not go back to normal. But a lot do, with healthy habits. Sounds like a good idea that she doesn’t have a baby if she’s that scared of something that might not even happen to her body. It shows she might be a crappy mother to care about something so superficial.
jbuckets_404 39
Just tell her "No, thanks" out of concern that her child might be born as a "stretched-out wobbly mess," too. Or else charge her up-front $50,000 for your surrogacy services. I'm sure she'll "jump" on the latter.
mekiswrite 21
I don't know if this is the way it works... can you hire a surrogate just because you don't want to be pregnant or experience the physical downsides of pregnancy?
ojoRojo 27
Pretty sure people do that all the time
mekiswrite 21
I have absolutely no clue... I don't think you can do that where I live, but again... no idea
Nhayaa 21
So glad we don't allow this in France.
sickerthanyou 13
Awesome!, be happy!, surrogates made bank!. Get all that money up front thou
mcsmee 8
Hopefully this is your husband's sister, rather than you brother's wife.