Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was savagely beating my wife on Call of Duty, since she demanded that I play normally and not hold back. 15 minutes later, she was raging at me, calling me a bastard and saying she wished we'd never married. FML
Today, I found out my husband doesn't love me. At all. He told me this while playing Call of Duty with his friends with his microphone on. FML
Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML
Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said, "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML
Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML
Today, I came home upset about the sexism in my work place. I just wanted to be alone, but my husband insisted we talk about it. I noticed he kept looking over and one of his hands was moving. He was playing video games the entire time I was spilling my guts. FML
Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML
Today, I invited a few of my co-workers over to play video games. Within an hour, my wife had gotten drunk, grabbed my controller, told me to "get back in the kitchen", and described to everyone in blood-chilling detail how she took her first boyfriend's virginity. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
WCARlover 35
Any man who gets angry over you giving him a ******* does not deserve a *******
Joheezy 14
That has surprisingly happened to me before, exact situation.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (109)
whiteguy21 4
BOOM. headshot…if ya know what i mean ?
Lika1712 11
Best wife right here! You made an effort. Guys do get really crazy when they're playing video games. It's cute though.
Uuuuxc 7
wow, so surprised that a douche bag like that gets a great girl. Who woulda thunk?
katt_is_here 24
Sounds like he doesn't deserve it.
jaydemonkey 6
Don't give him any more head if he wants to blame you because he sucks at cod.
DanielleinDC 34
What a schmuck, OP. He can go without head until he learns to behave like an adult. Which means not getting mad at you for distracting him when HE asked YOU to give him a ******* while he was playing.
brok3n88 5
LLS my boyfriend said "babe don't touch me while I play the game" and he is 31!!
YoursAlways98 13
Ungrateful :/
rogerover 19
Dude. Put down the game controller! Get your priorities straight.
Entovarian 4
Best. Wife. Ever.